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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

In many parts of the world, there is not enough food for everyone. What do you think are the causes of this ? What solutions can you suggest?

#parts #world #food
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Recently, many
foods
Suggestion
food
 chain has started to affect people
such
Linking Words
 as Burger King, Mc.
Donalds
Suggestion
Downloads
, etc. Unfortunately, most people prefer these restaurants because these restaurants
both
Use synonyms
 fast and delicious. In my opinion, fast food restaurants have started to attract people's attention because of these reasons so
obesity
Use synonyms
 has become a major health problem and
obesity
Use synonyms
 has many disadvantages for our lives
both
Use synonyms
 socially and
purposively
Suggestion
.
Obesity
Use synonyms
 can affect everything in our
life
Use synonyms
.
First
Linking Words
 of all,
obesity
Use synonyms
 can affect social
life
Use synonyms
 because
obesity
Use synonyms
 can make us shy people and if a
person
Use synonyms
 is obese, s
/
Use synonyms
he can'
t
Use synonyms
 go everywhere or s
/
Use synonyms
he can'
t
Use synonyms
 do everything.
For instance
Linking Words
, while a
person
Use synonyms
 is hanging out with their friends, they decided to go
o
in the direction of
to
on
of
 the
luna
a formation of people or things one beside another
line
Luna
park but
Accept comma addition
park, but
 if s
/
Use synonyms
he is obese, s
/
Use synonyms
he can'
t
Use synonyms
 go with their friends because most entertainment machines can'
t
Use synonyms
accept s
consider or hold as true
accepts
/
Use synonyms
he because of
weight
Use synonyms
 and
this
Linking Words
 issue can make her or him feel bad. Another disadvantage is
obesity
Use synonyms
 can prevent people's aim.
For example
Linking Words
, if an obese
person
Use synonyms
 wants to start a sport, unfortunately, s
/
Use synonyms
he
never improve
Suggestion
never improves
 her
/
Use synonyms
himself because her
/
Use synonyms
his
weight
Use synonyms
 prevents
this
Linking Words
 constantly and
this
Linking Words
 issue makes an unhappy
person
Use synonyms
.
Furthermore
Linking Words
,
obesity
Use synonyms
 can prevent visiting other countries because transport vehicles
such
Linking Words
 as planes don'
t
Use synonyms
 accept an obese
person
Use synonyms
 because their people's
weight
Use synonyms
 can be dangerous
for
Suggestion
to
both
Use synonyms
 themselves and other passengers.
Consequently
Linking Words
,
obesity
Use synonyms
 can be very harmful to
both
Use synonyms
 social
life
Use synonyms
 and healthy
life
Use synonyms
.
Moreover
Linking Words
,
obesity
Use synonyms
 can prevent what they want.
Therefore
Linking Words
, if a
person
Use synonyms
 is obese and s
/
Use synonyms
he wants to live well, s
/
Use synonyms
he must lose
weight
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by berra on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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