Research has shown that overeating is as harmful as smoking. Therefore, the advertising of certain food products should be banned in the same way as the advertising of cigarettes in some countries. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

It is widely believed that obesity represents one of the main problems in the most developed countries. Different researches have shown that junk
food
is as harmful as smoking and because of that we should ban the advertising of these foods follow the example of some countries that have banned the advertising of cigarettes.
However
, I strongly disagree with
this
point of view, as
i
refers to the speaker or writer
I
believe that these problems can be resolved with
food
prevention courses and introducing a specific regulation.
First
of all, many people do not know what they eat and
this
because they are not able to
undestand
know and comprehend the nature or meaning of
understand
what a specific of a
food
mean
such
as calories, carbohydrates or fats. A
food
prevention course can teach these people what is
an
Suggestion
a
healthy
food
and explain the dangers of the obesity.
For example
, A
food
prevention
course since
Accept comma addition
course, since
the primary school could teach how to eat healthy to our children and explain them why a fast
food
is not so good for them. That's
way
Suggestion
the way
the government should spend its money.
Submitted by Cirillo Chirullo on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: