Some people think that children should not watch television as it has negative effects while some people believe that they should watch television as it helps them in their future. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #children #television #effects #future

It is suggested that watching

television

has negative influence on children, even though others argued that media programs has

positive impact

Suggestion

a positive impact

positive impacts

. From my point of view,

television

provides a lot of benefits and raise knowledge among children.

However

, kids must be monitored by parents and censorship from authority about elements presented to children. On one hand, it is undeniable that

television

has been

revolutionary idea

Suggestion

a revolutionary idea

since it was invented and still the most popular innovation media programs is not

only source

Suggestion

the only source

of entertainment and

enJoyment

the pleasure felt when having a good time

enjoyment

among

individuals but

Accept comma addition

individuals, but

also

free flowing of information and knowledge through watching documentaries, educational programs and breaking news.

Similarly

, it will improve language skills by watching films with subtitles and promote curiosity to explore new culture.

Furthermore

, it is

affordable hobby

Suggestion

an affordable hobby

among families who don’t have enough money to engage in outdoor activities.

Besides

, it will help to strengthen family bonding when they are involved to watch it all together.

On the other hand

, it has

determental impact

Suggestion

a detrimental impact

detrimental impact

children which

Accept comma addition

children, which

can be explained through

maJor

of greater importance or stature or rank

major

factors.

Firstly

, watching

television

for long period of time is always

accompained

having companions or an escort

accompanied

by eating unhealthy food

suchas

Suggestion

such as

fastfood

Suggestion

fast food

, nuts and dessert that have

high level

Suggestion

high levels

a high level

of fats and sugar cause obesity which,

inturn

Suggestion

in turn

, leads to a lot of health problems.

Secondly

, it is observed that media

contains

Suggestion

contain

a lot of violence which has

exert

Suggestion

exerted

a serious threat on

behaviour

Suggestion

the behaviour

of children, it becomes more aggressive and tend to commit crime.

Last

but not the least, more time spending on Tv, less to interact with surrounding which incite children to be rather introvert. To

sumup

Suggestion

sum up

, despite the popularity of TV has achieved and benefits are provided to children, there are some drawbacks they must

considerite

showing concern for the rights and feelings of others

considerate

considered

and take their precautions to avoid any negative influence.

Submitted by bassem on Tue Jun 09 2020

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Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

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Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
19Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

294 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people think that children should not watch television as it has negative effects while some people believe that they should watch television as it helps them in their future. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

As a result of electronic inventions such as the computer and television, people do less physical activity, and this is having a negative effect on their health

In many countries children are engaged in some kid of paid work. Some people regard this as completely wrong,while other consider it as valuabl work .what is your opinion?

Some people think that it is more important to plant trees in open area of towns and cities than to bulid more housing. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Many museums charge for admission while others are free. Do you think the advantages of charging people for admission to museums outweigh the disadvantages?

Some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation, such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Others argue that it is better to try and improve such situations.