Some people think that a sense of competition in children should be encouraged. Others believe that children who are taught to co-operate rather than compete become more useful adults. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion

‘An apple a day keeps the doctor away’, a proverb since beginning of time that promotes ‘prevention is better than cure’.
Therefore
, a major share of a country’s
health
budget ought to be directed towards implementation of nationwide education and preventive
health
steps. While the idea might seem a bit far-fetched, I completely side with the execution of
such
approach. Prevention is fruitful in the long run.
Firstly
, from an economic point of view, it benefits both the individual and the government; as much of the fees spent
on
Suggestion
in
diagnostics, surgeries and medicines would be reduced.
For instance
, breast cancer is a common form of cancer amongst females over the age of 40.
However
, many women, especially in undeveloped countries, don’t approach the doctor until a later stage, due to lack of knowledge in the matter.
Thus
, resulting in a number of expensive tests, treatments and insurance money. Yet, yearly mammogram provided by the government for middle-aged women can help in early identification and reduction of
such
exorbitant costs.
Secondly
, rigorous measures can result in decreased mortality rate, healthier people and more productive citizens. To exemplify, governmental publicity campaigns illustrating the ill effects of smoking, drinking, not brushing your teeth and
overconsumption
Suggestion
over consumption
of fast-foods, can urge the people to take better care of themselves.
Moreover
, certain road-side slogans
such
as: ‘Don’t drink and drive, your furry friend will not understand why you didn’t return’, acting on
emotional side
Suggestion
the emotional side
of drivers can have a tremendous positive impact.
Additionally
, educational programmes highlighting simple hygiene steps
such
as: correct hand washing technique
,
Accept space
,
importance of discarding used needles
,
Accept space
,
covering
face
Suggestion
the face
while sneezing and avoiding unwarranted physical contact, can result in
prevention
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the prevention
or reduction of many dreadful diseases
;
Accept space
;
namely
:
Accept space
:
Covid-19, hepatitis and AIDS. According to an independent online survey in
USA
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the USA
,
Accept space
,
not only these initiatives increase
public’s awareness but
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the public’s awareness, but
the public’s awareness but
it
also
resulted in
decreased number
Suggestion
a decreased number
of people approaching
health
facilities. In conclusion, I believe in channeling
healthcare
Suggestion
health care
budget towards preventive
health
measures; in order to adopt a healthier and wealthier lifestyle.
Submitted by constan on

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Fully explain your ideas

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • encourage
  • compete
  • cooperate
  • useful
  • adults
  • skills
  • motivation
  • drive
  • resilience
  • failure
  • workplace
  • empathy
  • social skills
  • reduce
  • stress
  • pressure
  • balanced
  • approach
  • ideal
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