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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Some say that the most important thing about being rich is that one has the opportunity to help others.

#say #opportunity
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A group of people assert that affluent people are capable of assisting poor ones with philanthropy so that they can benefit from more standard life. Through
this
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 essay I will ponder over some vital areas in which rich people are able to help poor people.
First
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 and foremost, a great deal of poor youngsters
are suffering
Suggestion
is suffering
 from lack of education which leads to improper job in the future. Poverty brings about many drawbacks and misfortunes,
such
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 as illiteracy, followed by unemployment, which ends in low living condition.
In addition
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, it forces numerous poor children to become child labour for their survival. Wealthy people can donate a minor amount of their fortune to establish free schools, where deprived children would find the opportunity of being educated and having a preferable future. To cite an example, Iranian prosperous populace
allocate
Suggestion
allocates
 a part of their wealth to erect charity schools so that impoverished families can benefit from free education.
Moreover
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, philanthropists can dedicate their spare money for
healthcare
Suggestion
health care
 services. Many more impoverished families lose their offspring, for their habitat
have
Suggestion
has
 poor hygiene standards, and they cannot afford
healthcare
Suggestion
health care
 costs. Prosperous people are able to provide
healthcare
Suggestion
health care
 services for underprivileged families by allocating a significant budget to build charity hospitals. There are numbers of charity hospitals around the
world backed
Accept comma addition
world, backed
 by privileged people for the benefit of the poor. To recapitulate, it
appear
Suggestion
appears
 logical that rich people utilize their excess wealth for the well-being of other people in order that it may improve the level of their
lives
Suggestion
life
life's
 standards.
Submitted by mozhi r on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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