IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

what are your arguments about tourism industry? some people think it is beneficial and some think it has negative effects on culture and environment.

Nowadays, some people argue that
tourism industry
Suggestion
the tourism industry
 has many negative effects on the destination countries
such
Linking Words
 as their local
culture
Use synonyms
 and environment. In the following paragraphs, I am going to discuss how true
this
Linking Words
 statement is and what can tourists do to reduce negative effects on local
culture
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 and environment. When people from different countries and different cultures travel to a particular area with rich
culture
Use synonyms
, little by little they can cause some changes in local
culture
Use synonyms
for example
Linking Words
, local people will try to
use
Use synonyms
 foreign languages to have better connection with tourists and
as a result
Linking Words
 in a long term their local language will be forgotten or sometimes the traditional food will be replaced with some other foods from foreign countries.
Also
Linking Words
, tourists can have negative effects on
local environment
Suggestion
the local environment
local environments
 of destination countries.
For example
Linking Words
, their actions are usually against the sustainability, they
use
Use synonyms
 far more energy while they are on a trip comparing to their accommodation in their hometown, they produce a lot of trash which is hazardous need many infrastructures to collect and recycle them. To reduce these negative effects, tourists can take some actions,
for
Linking Words
example they
Accept comma addition
example, they
 can respect the
culture
Use synonyms
 and try to
use
Use synonyms
 their traditional features and maybe speak their language. They can
use
Use synonyms
 less energy like they are in their hometown and produce less trash. Totally, I think positive points of tourism industry outnumber its negative points.
Tourism industry
Suggestion
The tourism industry
 will increase the job opportunities for people from all ages and
also
Linking Words
 it contributes to
development
Suggestion
the development
 of various kinds of infrastructures and the development of economy in
destination country
Suggestion
the destination country
.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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