A government has a responsibility to its citizens to ensure their safety. Therefore, some people think that the government should increase spending on defence but spend less on social benefits. To what extent do you agree?

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Some people believe that to ensure the safety of the people, it is important to put more attention on the
defence
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system
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and less on social benefits.
Defence
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means
protection
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of the country from physical/military attacks and terror. It might be relevant to call
defence
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as the determining
power
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, back to the imperialism where war is really popular.
On the other hand
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, the circumstances of the current
world
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are changing. States have to pursue mutually beneficial activities
such
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as trade or environmental
protection
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in
order
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to survive. Because of that, talking about the safety of the
citizen
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, it is not enough to only concern about
citizen
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protection
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from a physical attack,
however
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, other sectors have to take into account as well. The social benefit is as significant as security, it covers
protection
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in the economic and social sectors, which now become one of the determining
power
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. With that being said,
this
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paper aims to prove that the government has to ensure the citizens’ safeties, by balancing the
defence
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and social benefits, without disregarding any of them. The existence of a security issue or
conflict
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in their country becomes one of the reasons why people believe in the motion above. The condition in the Middle-East
for example
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, during a
conflict
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time, the
state
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has to have a good
defence
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system
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in
order
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to protect its citizens and maintain
state
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stability.
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State
Suggestion
A state
with a strong
defence
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system
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usually be more respected, and most likely to win the war.
However
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, the
fact
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shows that the
conflict
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is mostly triggered by the increase of the
defence
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system
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itself. War in Iran
for example
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, one of the reasons the United States interferes in the Middle-East
conflict
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is due to the
fact
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that Iran keeps increasing its
defence
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system
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and not to mention nuclear weapons. The behaviour of a
state
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that keeps increasing their
defence
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system
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is potentially aggravating the conditions because it might increase the scepticism among
state
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which lead to a
conflict
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. Increasing the
defence
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system
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brings both good and bad impacts to the
state
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, at some point, it is definitely necessary to prevent the possibility of attack from other countries, yet it might
also
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trigger the attack if the attempt is exaggerated. As mentioned in the introduction, the
world
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is getting complex. Resulting in the shift of
power
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, where
defence
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is no longer an absolute determining
power
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, there are other sectors
such
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as economic, social-politic that
also
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important. Making social benefits
also
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occupy a significant role. Social benefits cover the attempt of economic development and social
order
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such
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as promotions of the workers, creation of training and employment opportunities, the degradation of the rate of unemployment, and so on. It is important to put attention to
this
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sector due to several reasons.
First
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, social benefits might create some sort of condition where the
citizen
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will most likely be able to obtain a decent life due to the creation of training and employment opportunities. These skills can become their provisions to survive, protect themselves, and compete with others during
this
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globalization era.
Second
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, if the citizens obtain a decent life, they will not question the government's decision because they feel satisfied.
This
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condition will maintain
state
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stability. If a particular
state
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is stable, the
citizen
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will most likely safe because there is less possibility of
conflict
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to occur.
This
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argument is supported by the
fact
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that most of the developed country actually has a balance
system
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in every sector
such
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as economy,
defence
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, and politics.
For example
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, European countries, the USA, and so on. The
world
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sometimes assumes that the USA hegemony is because the USA obtains an excellent
defence
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system
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,
however
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,
that is
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not the
fact
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, USA hegemony happened because the USA succeed to balance its
defence
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, economy, social benefits, and social-political
system
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.
(
Accept space
(
Make more effective) Security or
defence
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is no longer an absolute
power
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to determine the
world
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order
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. Meaning that, has a good
defence
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system
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without a good
system
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in other sectors
such
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as economy, politics, or
environment
Suggestion
the environment
is not making
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citizen
Suggestion
citizens
safe. With the complexity of the
world
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, where economic, social-politic, and environment are
also
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important, it is necessary to put concern on social benefit as well.
Therefore
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, the author believes that the government has to ensure the citizens’ safeties, by balancing the
defence
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and social benefits, without disregarding any of them.
Submitted by Frida Anjelina on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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