Some people think that children should be punished when they commit a crime. Some others think that their parents should be punished. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

For some people museums should be places where people can enjoy and spend time for entertainment.
However
, their opponents claim that these places' main aim
should be educate
Suggestion
should educate
people. They should possess both of
paths
Suggestion
the paths
,
Accept space
,
in my view. From one perspective, it is obvious that the main service of museums is to entertain people together with enjoying them. In well-known cities like New York and London are optimum destination for millions of tourists
anually
without missing a year
annually
.
Moreover
, they can see the exhibitions of
several nations
Suggestion
the several nations
or myths, but the annoying point of these excursions
are
Suggestion
is
highly likely
tobe
Suggestion
to be
the sound of
guide
Suggestion
the guide
. Most of
sections
Suggestion
the sections
there created
specially
to a distinctly greater extent or degree than is common
especially
for taking picturesque photos of
extincted
no longer in existence; lost or especially having died out leaving no living representatives
extinct
animals and gain information about them. After refurbishment taken in
National museum
Suggestion
the National museum
of London increased the number of visitors, all of
this
due to new artefacts and exhibits from Pharaohs in Egypt.
However
,
this
kind of places are not for only tourists, it is
also
for students. Some people have no interest
for
Suggestion
in
ancient history or exhibits, but just after they have visited museums their thoughts and world- views will probably
changed
Suggestion
change
. Because
abovemetioned
exhibits can kindle their interest, and they tend to find out information about them.
Moreover
, for the most parts young children visit those places in order to see celebrity people or former presidents like Franklin Roosevelt.
As a result
, these people can serve as a
stimuli
Suggestion
stimulus
for young, I think. According to
survey
Suggestion
a survey
conducted by German experts of Education shown that, over the half of pupils changed their characters and attitudes towards education due to trips organised to museums. To conclude, if museums follow both
path
Suggestion
paths
, government authorities and students would benefit from
this
, I think.
Submitted by Jakhongir on

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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