Some people think that the government is wasting money on the arts and this money could be better spent elsewhere. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Artistic creations are important aspects in making a place visually appealing to tourists and native residents.

However

, I believe that the Government is spending more than what is required in building statues and decorating roads. According to me, I feel that in a developing

country

like India, there are many other important aspects, which need immediate attention and fund.

Firstly

, in India,

majority

Suggestion

the majority

of the population belongs to a lower income family and

hence

, the percentage of

tax payers

someone who pays taxes

taxpayers

also

minimal.

Therefore

, wasting their money on something less important will not only be harmful for the future of the

country

, but

also

be a cause of

increase

Suggestion

the increase

in tax in future.

For example

, a few months back, the highest statue in India was unveiled and it was revealed that it cost several

crores

. While it is true that

such

activities can create several jobs for a certain time period, it cannot be ignored that those jobs will be deferred, once the

art work

photographs or other visual representations in a printed publication

artwork

is complete.

Secondly

, our

country

lacks many basic facilities.

For instance

, we need more educational institutes, hospitals, low cost medical facilities etc.

Thus

, when even the fundamental needs of the people are not getting fulfilled, in my opinion, spending on

arts

Suggestion

the arts

luxury

Suggestion

a luxury

Finally

, I believe that even though decorating our

country

holds some importance, we have much more important aspects to invest in.

Suggestion

we strengthen our infrastructure

first

, the aesthetics will automatically be taken care of, as proper education and job will nurture us to be more responsible citizens and a clean place can be equally beautiful to look at.

This

is why, I truly believe that spending money on arts now can prove to be expensive for us in near future.

Submitted by Amrita Dey on Wed Jun 17 2020

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13Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

288 words

5.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

enriching society
promoting cultural understanding
development of talent
creative industries
economic benefits
generate revenue
cultural heritage
identity
prioritize spending
needs of the majority

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