Although you have never formally studied computing, you have always been interested in computers. You have just read about a computer course that really interests you, but it is only for people who have completed an elementary course. Write a letter to the college enrolment officer. In your letter explain why you are writing describe your circumstances ask if a special exception can be made for you so you can enrol in the course

#computers #computer #course #interests #people #college #enrolment #officer #circumstances #exception #enrol

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Dear Sir / Madam, I am writing to inquire about your recent advertisement posted by your college about various computer courses offered and preliminary requirements. I am very much interested to enroll

for

Change preposition

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the computer course

Remove the comma

apply

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since

this

will be an added advantage to my career development. After carefully reading the requirements, I have not completed your basic criteria of elementary course due to myriad financial

crisis

Fix the agreement mistake

crises

show examples

in my family which devastated my educational goal and I could pursue for future studies. Having said that my learning intention

is not vanished

Change to the active voice

does not vanish

has not vanished

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from me anymore. So I want to

further

extend my wisdom in the computer field. I would place my humble request to shed some light

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my academic path and provide me with

Remove the article

apply

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sponsorship or feasible discount in

course

Add an article

the course

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fee as a stepping stone to

encouragement

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encourage

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me for my

further

studies. I look forward

hearing

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to hearing

show examples

from you with

a positive results

Correct the article-noun agreement

positive results

a positive result

show examples

. Yours faithfully, Mack Jonson

Submitted by Ganesh P on Sat Jun 20 2020

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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

2
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
10
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Greeting and closing

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

7 paragraphs

157 words

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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

Many countries spend a lot of money in art. Some people think investment in art is necessary, but others say money is better spent on improving health and education. Discuss both arguments and give your opinion

In a number of countries, some people think it is necessary to spend large sum of money on constructing new railway lines for veey fast trains between cities. Other believes the money should be spent on improving existing public transport. Discuss both views and give your opinion

Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones. Why is this the case? Is it a positive or negative trend?

You should spend about 40 minutes on this task. Some educationalists say that every child should be taught how to play a musical instrument. To what extent do you agree or disagree? You should write at least 250 words.

Write about the following topic. The internet has vastly increased our access to information. To what extent do you think this is a good thing? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. You should spend about 40 minutes on this task.