IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6

Some people think that getting a degree from a university is the best way to guarantee a good job, others believe that it would be better to go straight into work and get experience instead. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #university #guarantee #job #work
It is widely believed that being qualified is the outstanding way in order to have better
work
 in the future, meanwhile, others deem that acquiring job
experience
 should be considered as the major priority.
However
, as far as I am concerned that having job
experience
 can be much more helpful for these workers.
This
 essay will
firstly
 discuss both opinions and
secondly
, will elucidate my own view with the explanations. On the one hand, the majority of people claim that all students need to enhance their knowledge before they start their
work
 life.
Therefore
, the master degree has to seem them as a vital importance. Take
for instance
, there are some occupations
such
 as doctors and engineers and people who will
work
 in these fields should obtain enough education during their student years in order to be professional. In
this
 case, it is undeniable that they will accomplish their aim and can be successful workers.
On the other hand
, a multitude of people asserts that all prospective employers should have
work
experience
 until they straight into jobs. As an example, some professions
such
 as businesses do not base on worker’s knowledge. To put it simply, it is evident that if entrepreneurs have a desire to get accomplished, at
this
 moment, they should have some skills
such
 as time and communication management.
However
, these abilities do not teach in tertiary schools,
thus
 they ought to
work
 in some temporary workplaces while they feel ready to start a
work
 life with adequate
experience
.
Submitted by Ayshan on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • higher education
  • specialized fields
  • job prospects
  • earning potential
  • formal education
  • networking opportunities
  • career advancement
  • practical skills
  • work environment
  • financial independence
  • high costs
  • skills and experience
  • formal education
  • prioritize
What to do next:
Look at other essays: