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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

When the new towns are planned, it is more important to develop public parks or sports facilities than shopping centers for people to spend their free time in. to what extent do you agree or disagree?

#towns #parks #sports #facilities #centers #people #time
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It has long been a controversy whether we need more parks and sports
centers
an area that is approximately central within some larger region
centres
 or shopping malls in our cities. To me, I tend to vote for the former two facilities when considering their comprehensive benefits to the public health. Superficially, it is department stores the might be attractive to some people, especially the younger generation. To them, more shopping
centers
an area that is approximately central within some larger region
centres
centre
means
Suggestion
mean
 increasing convenience, which not just provides a wider variety of
commodities but
Accept comma addition
commodities, but
also
Linking Words
 saves
them much time in
Suggestion
them much time
 searching for different products.
This
Linking Words
 is
particular
Suggestion
particularly
 important to those busy working adults in a fast-paced modern life. Apart from urban dwellers, shopping
centers
an area that is approximately central within some larger region
centres
 are usually reckoned as a tourism attraction for
travelers
a person who changes location
travellers
, especially for those from developing countries. A convincing example is those super shopping malls in Paris and New York, which absorb millions of dollars to the local tourism every year.
However
Linking Words
, I would say that it is the parks and sports facilities the deserve more priority in
development
Suggestion
the development
 of new towns. While shopping
centers
an area that is approximately central within some larger region
centres
 are more like a paradise for youngsters, it is the public parks
that
Linking Words
is
Suggestion
are
 suitable for people of all ages and various interests to spend leisure time, from jogging to fishing, camping to painting. It provides a precious opportunity for each individual living in concrete jungles to relieve themselves in nature, which is beneficial to their mental health.
Also
Linking Words
, more sports facilities will make it easy for people to do exercise, which in turn will increase the physical fitness of the public,
thus
Linking Words
 simulating an active lifestyle for those who are collapsing in front of computers. To sum up, attractive though shopp
ing cen
an area that is approximately central within some larger region
centres
ters are, I would reiterate that it is public parks and athletic facilities
that is
Linking Words
 conducive to the health of the masses
Submitted by Ngoc Le on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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