The use of mobile phone is as antisocial as smoking. Smoking is banned in certain places so mobile phone should be banned like smoking. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

With the changing time a paradigm shift has been observed that the way of people living has been changed due to
enhancement
Suggestion
the enhancement
of the technology devices. Some echelons of the society believe that
mobiles
Suggestion
mobile
phone
are
Suggestion
is
harmful for the mankind so it should be banned same like a smoking. I disagree with the statement because of various reasons, which I will elaborate in the following paragraphs. Smoking is
totally different concept
Suggestion
a totally different concept
as compare to mobile phones because smoking
cause
Suggestion
causes
cancer, which I believe mobile cannot do anything like that. Smoking
cause
Suggestion
causes
smoker as well as
non-smoker
a person who does not smoke tobacco
nonsmokers
. Recent research proved that the passive smoker is at more risk of cancer than active smoker
that is
why smoking is banned in the public places. Even mobiles are
also
restricted
at
Suggestion
in
some public places
such
as religious, hospitals, library and other many
place
Suggestion
places
because sometime mobile distract the people from their work
such
as in
library
Suggestion
a library
the library
libraries
in between the reading book a loud voice of mobile destroy the peace of
library
Suggestion
the library
and distract all the individuals, who are available at
time
Suggestion
a time
the time
times
their
in or at that place
there
.
However
, there are numerous merits the use of mobile phone.
Firstly
, mobiles are the only device
nowadays which
Accept comma addition
nowadays, which
connect the people to each other because of
this
one’s connect with their
family
Suggestion
families
and friends no matter where one
are living
Suggestion
is living
in the world.
Hence
, it
is connect
Suggestion
connects
the world as a global village.
Secondly
, mobiles are the source of education as well as entertainment.
Therefore
, we can use mobile as a book for reading book with
help
Suggestion
the help
of e books and as
a
Suggestion
an
entertainment by using
youtube
Suggestion
YouTube
or any other applications.
Thus
, people can easily find any type of material, songs, video and games as well. To recapitulate, mobiles
are play
Suggestion
are playing
play
have played
an
Suggestion
a
vital role in every individual life because of it commercial and
finically
from a financial point of view
financially
use in every sector. So, with comparison of smoking
o
introduces an alternative
or
do not believe
its
the thing named or in question
it
is fair enough because mobiles have a lot of
benefits but
Accept comma addition
benefits, but
smoking just have
disadvantage
Suggestion
a disadvantage
and root of cancer.
Submitted by jassalbaljinder2163 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • antisocial
  • social interactions
  • negative impacts
  • banning
  • regulated
  • completely banned
  • education
  • awareness campaigns
  • responsible
  • mobile phone use
What to do next:
Look at other essays: