Some people think that cultural traditions may be destroyed when they are used as money-making attractions aimed at tourists. Others believe it is the only way to save these traditions. Discuss on both sides and give your opinion.

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It is true that traditional cultures have attracted more and more visitors and have generated extreme profit for
tourism industry
Suggestion
the tourism industry
. While I tend towards the viewpoint that local cultures should not
being
Suggestion
be
exploited for earning money from travellers, I believe that there is a better alternative to preserve these customs. On the one hand, there are clear arguments against
culture
Use synonyms
commodification
Suggestion
. When traditions are treated like commodities, it would be changed to satisfy
tourists
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tourists'
tourist
needs. As
consequence
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a consequence
, financial profits gained can lead to
culture
Use synonyms
erosion which damages local customs. A significant example is The Mosuo Tribe in China, where locals
have changed
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change
their daily activities in order to deliver
visitors
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visitors'
visitor's
experience and gain money from those travellers. In result, the traditional way of life has been replaced with tourist services, which brings more money for local people.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, the protection from local
government
Use synonyms
is a trusted way to prevent an indigenous
culture
Use synonyms
from elimination. To explain, the financial budget from the
government
Use synonyms
stably support resident of attractions maintain their conventions.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, the local authorities can help attractions receive public awareness, which brings to local people not only donations but
also
Linking Words
numerous
supporting
exhibiting or calling for sportsmanship or fair play
sporting
activities
from
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of
individuals.
For example
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, several indigenous attractions in North Viet Nam have been supported by charities and volunteers after fundraising events hosted by the
government
Use synonyms
. As
result
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a result
, these traditions have been survived, and the cultures of these places are widely spreading not only to domestic but
also
Linking Words
to
outlanders
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Outlanders
. In conclusion, it seems to me that the drawbacks of
Use synonyms
culture
Suggestion
cultural
commodification
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outweigh the benefits, and the local
government
Use synonyms
plays
Suggestion
play
a vital role in saving these indigenous cultures.
Submitted by Tuan Anh Dang on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Commercialization
  • Dilution of cultural traditions
  • Authenticity
  • Cultural heritage
  • Revenue
  • Financial support
  • Preservation
  • Promotion
  • Commodification of culture
  • Intrinsic value
  • Exposure
  • Global awareness
  • Respect and understanding
  • Economic gain
  • Local communities
  • Decision-making processes
  • Respectful portrayal
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