IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

In many place, prisons are overcrowded and expensive for governments to maintain. Yet, when offenders are released, they end up back in short while later. Do prisons work?

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In several countries,
imprisonment
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 is the most common forms of
punishment
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.
However
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, the effect of
this
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 trend, a high percentage of prison’s commit the
crime
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 once they released into the community. So, criminals are imprisoned again and
this
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 cycle is continuous forever. I think, the
imprisonment
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 cannot decrease the
crime
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 rate in the nation. My preference is justified in the ensuing paragraphs.
To begin
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 with, the
punishment
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 of
imprisonment
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 cannot drop the criminal ratio. There are several reasons for
such
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 situation.
Firstly
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, offenders enjoy a comfortable life in prisons. Many of them access the luxury lifestyle,
such
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 as using a mobile phone, watching television, access internet and playing sports.
Therefore
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, lawbreakers cannot learn life lessons.
Instead
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 of
this
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, they can enjoy
this
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punishment
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 prisons to act, they should have some strong law as per their criminal acts.
Secondly
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, all lawbreakers do not separate from the society. Keeping some criminals in the same calls as rapists, murders or violent criminals actually aggravate the situation. To elaborate
this
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, the criminals, after serving their time in prisons, the minor offenders often turn into professional criminals.
Moreover
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, the authority spends high cost of
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imprisonment but
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imprisonment, but
 they cannot learn life lessons. So, punishing criminals through heavy fines, community service or other non-custodial means is a better option. To close the discussion, I can understand that the criminals, who commit a
crime
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, they cannot allow to stay freely in the society. But, for other offences prison is not the proper way to decrease the
crime
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 rate. I believe that the seriousness of the
crime
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 committed should examine before deciding on the
punishment
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.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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