IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

According to most doctors, adults need thirty minutes of physical activity at least five days a week to be healthy. However, most adults do not get this recommended amount of exercise. What can be done to help people get the exercise they need? Give examples to support your answer.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
It is often advised by
health
Use synonyms
 experts that youngsters and middle-aged people need thirty minutes in at least every five days per week in advance to carry out exercises in order to be in good shape.
However
Linking Words
, the majority of adults choose to deny doing physical activities.
This
Linking Words
 essay will highlight some methods which are extremely handy to encourage people to do exercise. The main reason behind the need for taking exercise seriously is that adults, are too lazy and procrastinate to go to the
gym
Use synonyms
 or even do some pushups. These results come from the hustle culture in which everybody is working as hard as everyone else, in the hope of pursuing their goals and dreams and the consequence is they forgot to take a good look at their current
health
Use synonyms
.
For example
Linking Words
, people who live in Japan work so hard for
such
Linking Words
 a long period of time that they forgot to take care of themselves,
suchsuch
Suggestion
such such
 as doing work out, settle down, have a good sleep.. Etc. In order to encourage citizens to work out more, I firmly believe that governments should build more
gym
Use synonyms
 centres and parks and
this
Linking Words
,
however
Linking Words
, creates the perfect environment for people to come and do some exercises in terms of improving their physical
health
Use synonyms
.
For instance
Linking Words
, in Vietnam there are lots of parks and
gym
Use synonyms
 centre that are being opened twenty-four hours per day which allow the citizen to enhance their state of
health
Use synonyms
 every day. In conclusion, the benefits of doing physical exercise are undeniably good in terms of improving people's
health
Use synonyms
.
However
Linking Words
, encourage methods like building more parks and
gym
Use synonyms
 centres should be applied and considered to help both adults and teenagers to have a crystal clear on how important it is to their
health
Use synonyms
.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: