Some people believe that success in life comes from hard work and determination, while others think that there are more important factors such as money and appearance. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

No
one
can deny that the successful
life
is the most desirable goal in their
life
or career. Of all the factors impacting achievement, there are debates which
one
is the most crucial contributors,
for instance
, some people argue that
one
's poverty and physical beauty are necessary,
however
others believe that
one
's abilities,
such
as great decision-making skill or hard-working are essential to achieve success in
life
. I personally agree with later
one
, and I believe that
one
's efforts prioritise than gifted
one
including good looking and a large amount of asset. Some sets of peoples argue that personal finance and charming appearance makes people to reach a peak of their career and
life
. In the
first
place, the good looking is essential to attracting
one
's favour, considering the human nature, people prefer the beauty than an ugly
one
,
thus
those people who with a beauty will be easily recognised
one
's abilities in a work,
then
it leads to them promote faster than ordinary people.
As a result
, they are highly possible to win in
life
.
Secondly
, for achieving the success, the seed money is a crucial,
for example
, people who have enough asset to invest can start their own business much easier than people who need to a finance loan. They will seize a chance to ensure victory in the fields. Admittedly, I partly agree with two factors that a personal best looking and poverties,
however
, there are more valuable contributors that reaching the peak of
life
. Some folks believe that personal abilities,
such
as a great series of decision-making skill and a hard-working, play a pivotal role in achieving the sneers. More specifically,
hard
Suggestion
Hard
work helps people gain some valuable experiences in aspects of
life
. To illustrate my point, if young student practices several times, some kinds of assignments in college and home, they are likely to minimize the risk of repeating the same mistakes so they have the tendency to get high scores in the formal exam.
Secondly
, determination gives us the motivation to set up goals that become the foundation of success.
As a result
,
this
is an essential skill to allow people to overcome complex problems in all situations and always keep moving forward to reach long-term goals. In conclusion,
although
money and personal appearance have an influence on achievement, it seems to me that hard work and determination are dominant factors to get the highest achievement.
Submitted by YouTube yang on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • perseverance
  • discipline
  • resilience
  • effort
  • tenacity
  • external factors
  • financial resources
  • favorable appearance
  • perceptions
  • advantages
  • intrinsic
  • extrinsic
  • sustainable
  • facilitating
  • undeniable
What to do next:
Look at other essays: