Each year, the crime rate increases. What are the causes of crime and what could be done to prevent this rise in criminal activity?

#year #crime #rate #increases #rise #activity

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Crime

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is becoming an issue of increasing concern all around the world. The number of criminal activity is growing and the reasons for

this

Linking Words

trend are countless. In my opinion, unemployment and poverty are the key

factors

Accept comma addition

factors, however

however

Linking Words

, governments can tackle

this

Linking Words

issue by improving

job

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opportunity

in addition

Linking Words

to imposing a stricter punishment law. One undeniable reason why people commit a

crime

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is the significant increase of unemployment rate. People with no paying

job

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cannot afford the high cost of living or buy their essentials including food and clothes.

Moreover

Linking Words

, most of unemployed people are not educated and have no skills or qualifications to work and earn

salary

Suggestion

a salary

and as a consequence they live in poverty. In most cases, they steal to fund themselves or do other petty crimes. If these offenders continue these habits may lead to more organized and gun

crime

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Crime rate

Suggestion

The crime rate

A crime rate

Crime rates

can be reduced by punishing the criminals and enforce the criminal law. Punishments

such

Linking Words

as fine and prison sentence can act as

deterrent

Suggestion

a deterrent

not only to stop criminals to re-

offend but

Accept comma addition

offend, but

also

Linking Words

others who think of committing a

crime

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. According to a research conducted on prisoners, around 75% of them stop doing any criminal activity after they released from jail.

Furthermore

Linking Words

government

Suggestion

the government

should improve citizen’s standard of living by providing education and vocational training to promote employment

opportunity particularly in

Suggestion

opportunity, particularly in

poor areas. If those people can get a

job

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with reasonable salary, they will be self-sufficient and better citizens. In conclusion,

crime

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is a result of low-economic status of people and poor life.

In addition

Linking Words

to common punishments that

government

Suggestion

the government

should apply to ensure that people are following the rules, improving education and

job

Use synonyms

opportunity are other measures that can help to

reducing

Suggestion

reduce

Use synonyms

crime level

Suggestion

crime levels

the crime level

Submitted by Nour Zegalie on Tue Jun 30 2020

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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7
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
10
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

5.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

291 words

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Each year, the crime rate increases. What are the causes of crime and what could be done to prevent this rise in criminal activity?

Fully explain your ideas

Most people believe that social media such as Facebook and Instagram negatively impact on society and individuals. To what extent do you agree or disagree

Some people believe that professionals, such as doctors and engineers, should be required to work in the country where they did their training. Others believe they should be free to work in another country if they wish. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

In most societies juvenile crime is increasing. Discuss some possible reasons for this and suggest solutions

The illustrations show how chocolate is produced. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

in some countries university students live at home with their family while they study, whereas in other countries students attend university in another city.