Some people think that news has no connection with people’s lives; so it is a waste of time to read newspapers and watch television news programmes. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #news #connection #people’s #lives #waste #time #newspapers #television #programmes

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Many people believe that it is a waste of time to read the

news which

Accept comma addition

news, which

they think is irrelevant to what is happening

Suggestion

our own life. I totally disagree. On the one hand, when people think that news is unrelated to their life, they tend to think about

international and entertaining news

Suggestion

the international and entertaining news

. For them, most reports on international emergencies and events that they read about

are

Suggestion

being

pointless as they are happening outside of their local community.

Also

Linking Words

, news coverage of celebrities on TV or the newspaper is purely entertaining and is meaningless to those who show no interest in

entertainment

Suggestion

entertaining

Thus

Linking Words

, reading the news seems to be purposeless.

However

Linking Words

, they seem to be much biased, as any piece of news can be remarkably helpful in our lives.

For example

Linking Words

, the news about celebrities could be valuable for the fans resorting to the news media to stay informed about who and what they are interested in. The

second

Linking Words

example that could be compelling to prove the importance of reading news is the information about the outbreak of

coronavirus

Suggestion

in Italy. If we-know-who had not ignored

this

Linking Words

state of emergency declared officially via the mass media and blindly visited the affected area and returned home without an honest health declaration as instructed on the news, they might not have been quarantined and been a factor to spread the disease.

Otherwise

Linking Words

, those concerned and informed could take corresponding actions to stay

safe right

Accept comma addition

safe, right

away and keep their community safe. In conclusion, it seems to be not a good idea to think that there is no interrelation between the news and our lives.

Therefore

Linking Words

, I do not agree that reading news is a time-wasting activity and I think that people should read the news to be up-to-date.

Submitted by Ba Huy Nguyen on Wed Jul 01 2020

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8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.5

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

294 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

essential information
local events
public health
impact
political developments
participating
democratic processes
international news
global issues
interconnectedness
economic news
personal financial decisions
investments
cultural news
social awareness
community engagement
selective consumption
knowledgeable
pertinent matters

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