Some people say that parents should encourage their children to take part in organised group activities in their free time.

Some people argue that children should be encouraged by their parents to take
part
in
group
activities in their free time.
However
, other people say that children should learn
from
Suggestion
about
themselves in free time. In my opinion, they are both important for children On one hand, it has positive effects to improve children’s skills when they
work
in a
group
.
First
of all, taking
part
in
group
activities helps children to build up teamwork. Teamwork plays an important role during
work
nowadays. People couldn’t finish a job when they
work
without their colleagues. And it is a good way to let people know the importance when they
work
together in childhood.
In addition
, working together helps children to learn from others. When children
work
in a
group
, they can share their ideas to solve problems.
Therefore
, it is important for children to take
part
in a
group
.
On the other hand
, it is important for children to learn from
themselves
objective case of they
them
.
First
, when children are asked to
work
by themselves, they will become more independent. Because they don’t have to rely on somebody, they have to push themselves to
work
out questions. It is important to let them know they have
ability
Suggestion
the ability
to finish a job.
Furthermore
, learning from themselves help children to build up leadership. As we known, leadership management is the most important
part
in a company. But not everyone has the ability to
management
Suggestion
manage
managing
a team. Overall, working independently has made
positive impact
Suggestion
a positive impact
on children. In my opinion, it is important to let children know they should
work
together and become independent in specific situations. When they are in a
group
, they should have to
work
together. But when they are asked to
work
independently, they should engage attention to themselves. Overall, they
are both have
Suggestion
are both having
have both
have both had
are both have
positive effects for children when they are growing.
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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • encourage
  • occupied
  • organized
  • group activities
  • benefits
  • social
  • teamwork skills
  • interpersonal skills
  • friendship
  • discipline
  • time management
  • interests
  • hobbies
  • independent play
  • creativity
  • problem-solving skills
  • self-reliance
  • explore
  • discover
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