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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Some people say that parents should encourage their children to take part in organised group activities in their free time.

#people #parents #children #part #group #activities #time
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Some people argue that children should be encouraged by their parents to take
part
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 in
group
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 activities in their free time.
However
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, other people say that children should learn
from
Suggestion
about
 themselves in free time. In my opinion, they are both important for children On one hand, it has positive effects to improve children’s skills when they
work
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 in a
group
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.
First
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 of all, taking
part
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 in
group
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 activities helps children to build up teamwork. Teamwork plays an important role during
work
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 nowadays. People couldn’t finish a job when they
work
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 without their colleagues. And it is a good way to let people know the importance when they
work
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 together in childhood.
In addition
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, working together helps children to learn from others. When children
work
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 in a
group
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, they can share their ideas to solve problems.
Therefore
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, it is important for children to take
part
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 in a
group
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.
On the other hand
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, it is important for children to learn from
themselves
objective case of they
them
.
First
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, when children are asked to
work
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 by themselves, they will become more independent. Because they don’t have to rely on somebody, they have to push themselves to
work
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 out questions. It is important to let them know they have
ability
Suggestion
the ability
 to finish a job.
Furthermore
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, learning from themselves help children to build up leadership. As we known, leadership management is the most important
part
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 in a company. But not everyone has the ability to
management
Suggestion
manage
managing
 a team. Overall, working independently has made
positive impact
Suggestion
a positive impact
 on children. In my opinion, it is important to let children know they should
work
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 together and become independent in specific situations. When they are in a
group
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, they should have to
work
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 together. But when they are asked to
work
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 independently, they should engage attention to themselves. Overall, they
are both have
Suggestion
are both having
have both
have both had
are both have
 positive effects for children when they are growing.
Submitted by 梁家航 on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • encourage
  • occupied
  • organized
  • group activities
  • benefits
  • social
  • teamwork skills
  • interpersonal skills
  • friendship
  • discipline
  • time management
  • interests
  • hobbies
  • independent play
  • creativity
  • problem-solving skills
  • self-reliance
  • explore
  • discover
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