Some people think that it is important to construct new buildings rather than wasting money on maintaining old ones. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Today many

Accept comma addition

Today, many

people claim that too much money is being allocated

Suggestion

for

the upkeep of older buildings that would be better utilised on modern infrastructure. In my opinion, though new buildings are more practical, old buildings are indispensable cultural relics.

First

of all, those old

architecture

Suggestion

architectures

tells about a

countries

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country's

countries'

efforts how they change situations for better,

also

about the heroic people who did good to provide facilities for better generation.

For instance

, The great wall of china is representing the dedication of the king and effort of the people to protect nations from other. The Tajmahal was built by king Shahjahan to express his love for her wife. Those

building

Suggestion

buildings

are the wonders now as they are acting as inspiration for us, so it is totally meaningless not to protect them.

Secondly

, historical places are

main tourist attraction

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the main tourist attraction

of a country. Not only it represents ones culture and

art but

Accept comma addition

art, but

also

sets a good tourist business. Millions of money

are being added

Suggestion

is being added

countries economy

Suggestion

the countries economy

a countries economy

for those historical monuments. So destroying them is a way of big economic loss. A historical building is a great object for architectural historian. Many lost civilization has come in front of us with all those buildings,

also

act as a source of information for research work. There are many buildings in the world which is a wonder of engineering work that acts as inspiration for modern engineer.

Therefore

, replacing all old one with new buildings

Suggestion

has been

just a big loss for whole nations both culturally and economically. And

most importantly

Suggestion

most important

those monuments are taking a small place of a county. If anyone wants to build new buildings that can be done in

another

not the same one or ones already mentioned or implied

other

places without destroying those valuable work. Those

history

Suggestion

histories

inspired us and lead us

develop

Suggestion

to develop

for far better way. With the economy that earned from

tourist

Suggestion

tourists

a tourist

the tourist

is helping countries to progress.

Thus

, history working silently to forward us. To sum up, a historical architecture is a

master piece

the most outstanding work of a creative artist or craftsman

masterpiece

of nations as well as a valuable asset. Government should be more dedicated and careful to beautify and protect them.

Submitted by Nodirbek on Sat Jul 04 2020

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Fully explain your ideas

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
16Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

347 words

5.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.5

Complete response

5.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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