Many people like to wear fashionable clothes. Why do you think this is the case? Is this a good thing or bad thing?

#people #clothes #case

It is

undoubled

render capable or able for some task

enabled

that people’s appearance is becoming more and more significant than in the past few decades because of the influence

Suggestion

more and more events about beauty

such

fashion show

Suggestion

fashion shows

a fashion show

and pageant. The intention of beauty is

also

showing

Suggestion

shown

on the clothes that people are wearing. Here are some reasons demonstrated that why people intend to wear fashionable clothes.

First

of all, wearing new released clothes makes them feel they are not being left behind. They want to be part of

this

modern society, and they want to have

social connection

Suggestion

a social connection

with the fast-changing world.

Fashion

industry as one of

the fast

Suggestion

the fastest

-changing

industry which

Accept comma addition

industry, which

indicates that who follow the

fashion

, who will get the newest trend.

Additionally

, main force media and its advertisements constantly convey the information that people need to buy fashionable clothes to build confidence. They even use famous celebrities to influence people to buy

more newest

Suggestion

more new

clothes. Those younger generations with

unmatured

mindset who has

took

Suggestion

taken

the most energy form stars will receive the information and apply the rules to the real life, which lead to an even more wave of chasing

fashion

. In my opinion, over chasing

fashion

is unreasonable. It will let you lose your identity since you are looking exactly the same with your peers, which is

also

unhealthy for personal development in foresting

unique

Suggestion

uniquely

characteristic.

Furthermore

, spending

Suggestion

more money on buying a lot of new clothes that are not under discount will lead to unbalanced of your allowance which commonly happened to young people. To

concluded

Suggestion

conclude

, common value

is not only be

Suggestion

has not only been

the responsibility of young people’s parents, but

also

the obligation of

main force

Suggestion

the main force

. More and more focus on the

fashion

will lead the society to the unhealthy trending chasing. If more valuable information can be brought through the media, the world will become better.

Submitted by Miyui on Wed Jul 08 2020

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Fully explain your ideas

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Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
15Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

307 words

4.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Many people like to wear fashionable clothes. Why do you think this is the case? Is this a good thing or bad thing?

Fully explain your ideas

Many people are changing their careers. what are the reasons for changing? and can there be any positive or negative impact by person or by society as whole.

Some experts believe that it is better for children to begin learning a foreign language at primary school rather than secondary school. Do the advantages ot this outweigh the disadventages

In the past, people used to travel to see the differences from their home country. However, the sceneries in places around the world seem similar nowadays. What are the causes of these similarities? Do you think that the advantages of these similarities outweigh the disadvantages?

Some people think that excessive use of smart phones badly affectts teenager’s literacy skills. Do you agree or disagree?

Some people feel that manufacturers and supermarkets have the responsibility to reduce the amount of packagingof goods.Others argue that customers should avoid buying goods with a lot of packaging.Discuss both views and give your opinion.