IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Every country should have a free health service, even if this means that the latest medical treatments may not be available through the service because they are too expensive. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#country #health #service #treatments
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
As a free
health
Use synonyms
care
Use synonyms
system
Use synonyms
 is no longer a privilege only found in
developed
Suggestion
developing
 countries, more and more developing countries are advocating to build their own free
health
Use synonyms
care
Use synonyms
 systems. I agree with the argument that every
country
Use synonyms
 should be able to provide basic and free
health
Use synonyms
care
Use synonyms
 services to its own nationals. Ethically speaking, a
country
Use synonyms
 should have the ability to make everyone's basic
health
Use synonyms
care
Use synonyms
 needs met. By providing free
health
Use synonyms
care
Use synonyms
 services, even those who cannot afford the fees to treat their own diseases would be able to enjoy the services. That would mean a lot
to
Suggestion
of
 the poor. In the most recent disastrous
coronavirus
Suggestion
 outbreak, imagine if a
country
Use synonyms
 is not able to provide free services to those who are affected and who are unable to pay for the
treatment
Use synonyms
 fees. Not only would it be a tragedy for the patients, but it would
also
Linking Words
 be a disaster for the
country
Use synonyms
. As those who cannot afford to pay the
health
Use synonyms
care
Use synonyms
 services won't seek for
Use synonyms
treatment plan
Suggestion
a treatment plan
,
this
Linking Words
 would result in a potential spread of the disease. No matter whether we are speaking about a level which personal needs should be met or speaking at a level where the whole
country
Use synonyms
's wealth fare should be considered, an accessible
health
Use synonyms
care
Use synonyms
system
Use synonyms
 which can provide free services can help the poor in a tremendous way. We are all human beings in the end. Economically speaking, as free
health
Use synonyms
 services become accessible to all citizens, the
health
Use synonyms
 condition of the labour force in
this
Linking Words
country
Use synonyms
 is ensured. A Healthy labour force means the potential to create more value for the
country
Use synonyms
. Every year the economic loss caused by physical disabilities or mental disabilities among the labourers who are of a working age is huge. If a
health
Use synonyms
care
Use synonyms
system
Use synonyms
 is able to provide free services to these people, it would save the
country
Use synonyms
 a lot financially. In summary, I agree with the perspective that free
health
Use synonyms
care
Use synonyms
 services should be provided within each
Use synonyms
country even
Accept comma addition
country, even
 if it means that the most advanced medical
treatment
Use synonyms
 would not be applied to patients via
such
Linking Words
 a
system
Use synonyms
. I believe there would always be people who are willing to pay for the latest
treatment
Use synonyms
 plan out of their own pockets. In
this
Linking Words
 case, it is not necessary to cover these treatments in the free services
Submitted by MK on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: