Watching a live performance such as a play, concert, or sporting event is more enjoyable than watching the same event on television. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#live #performance #play #concert #event #television

Nowadays some people prefer to

joining

Suggestion

join

live activates

such

spectacle

or sporting match or

concert

than enjoy some

television

program on TV. In my opinion, I disagree that

television

does not help people who do not have

many

the most common medium of exchange; functions as legal tender

money

for buying a ticket on live activities and they live in

small town

Suggestion

a small town

their country.

First

of all, a person who wants to enjoy a live

concert

or sporting match or

spectacle

must have a lot of

money

for buying a ticket on different activities.

This

means that people who work on small paying work do not have free

money

for watching activities and they can watch these

activities online on

Suggestion

online activities on

television

For example

, many people who live in

Russian outback

Suggestion

the Russian outback

do not have

money

for visiting a live

concert

Thus

, many people have a chance of watching a new

concert

or sports activity or musical

concert

on the TV in their home. Another point to consider that people who live in small town do not have an opportunity

for

Suggestion

going in a big city.

In other words

, the distance between cities has a big amount

kilometers

Suggestion

kilometre

kilometres

that is

why people spent a lot of time moving

Suggestion

the big city.

For instance

, the distance between Russian cities has bigger

kilometers

a metric unit of length equal to 1000 meters (or 0.621371 miles)

kilometres

than another country

that is

why many people cannot travel often.

Therefore

, people who cannot go to the nearest big city for visiting a

concert

spectacle

have the possibility of attending a

concert

while watching online. In conclusion, despite people having a different opinion, I think that

television

gives the possibility of watching online for many people who cannot attend on

concert

or sporting event or

spectacle

and they do not have free

money

for it.

Submitted by Julia on Tue Jul 14 2020

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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
9Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

287 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

immersive experience
replicated
energy
atmosphere
sense of community
shared excitement
unforgettable
predictable
convenience
comfort
crowds
travel
multiple camera angles
close-ups
replays
enhancing

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Watching a live performance such as a play, concert, or sporting event is more enjoyable than watching the same event on television. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Some people say that the main environmental problem of our time is the loss of particular species of plants and animals. Others say that there are more important environmental problems. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Some schools are very strict about their school uniforms and the appearence of their pupil, while other scholls have a very relaxed dress code. What are advantages and disadvantages of children of having a school uniform?.

Some people say that music is a good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?