schools have a responsibility to monitor what the students eat and the amount of exercise they do

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Introduction
Obesity is becoming a problematic issue in the younger generation of Australia, where approximately 66 percent of them suffer from
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preventable disease. Some people suggest that schools are responsible for the treatment and prevention by monitoring their
food
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intake
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and exercise output.
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essay will discuss why I completely agree that schools should monitor children by illustrating two reasons.
Body paragraph 1
The primary reason is that by counting the
food
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intake
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, schools can keep all the students' health in the track. By keeping the
food
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-
intake
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in limit, helps the children to maintain the metabolism and avoids their
weight
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gain. According to recent studies, it has been observed that around 60 percent of the people won't gain
weight
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if have a proper amount of
food
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intake
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.
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, by counting the
food
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intake
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schools can play a vital role in balancing their diet and preventing children from not gaining unnecessary fat.
Body paragraph 2
The secondary reason is that by counting the volume of energy lost by doing training schools can not only balance the child's
weight
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but can
also
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cure them from obesity. Children can see a difference in their
weight
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if
number
Suggestion
the number
of calories consumed is less than the number of calories burnt. As per 2016 survey, around 25 percent of the children recovered quickly by following
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principle of burning calories through rigorous exercise.
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, by tracking the amount of energy spent by children on daily basis schools can prepare Gant charts for children and guide them and cure them from
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preventable disease.
Conclusion
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essay discussed why schools play a prominent role in monitoring the child's
food
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intake
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and exercise output because by doing
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, they can help the children to cure from
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disease. In my opinion, schools should be eager to take the responsibility of children so that they won't face health problems in future due to obesity.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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