In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?

Children in some countries are usually educated that they can accomplish any goal by putting enough
effort
. Personally,
although
this
message may lead to great achievements, making
effort
alone cannot guarantee
success
for everyone.   Regarding the positivity, it has long been considered that
success
is a result of persistence and willingness to work hard to overcome every failure. The best example of
this
attitude comes from
Japan where
Accept comma addition
Japan, where
every child is encouraged to defeat any struggle by setting their mind to it. And today, Japan is not only a powerful and modern
country but
Accept comma addition
country, but
also
is a global leader in electronics industries.
As a result
, when children are equipped with the belief that anything will be achieved with enough
effort
, they are more likely to conquer the challenges and become successful.  
Analyzing
Suggestion
Analysing
the negativity, just focusing on the connection between
effort
and
success
may bring a detrimental impact on children. In fact, when a child tries as hard as he can but still did not achieve the desired outcome, he may be depressed and consider himself a failure.
This
phenomenon is relatively popular in China. Every year
this
country registers a high rate of depressive symptoms in students after finishing the national college entrance
examination partly
Accept comma addition
examination, partly
because they cannot reach the expected goal
although
 they spend several years working around the clock.
Consequently
, hard work is an essential ingredient but supposing it can guarantee
success
may lead to disastrous outcomes.   In conclusion, despite controversial
on
Suggestion
in
determining the effects of teaching children that they can achieve anything by putting enough
effort
, obviously, you have to do more than just working hard to succeed.
Submitted by Sofie Bui on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • achieve
  • try hard
  • positive mindset
  • self-belief
  • motivates
  • ambitious goals
  • resilience
  • determination
  • confidence
  • self-esteem
  • growth mindset
  • unrealistic expectations
  • disappointment
  • failure
  • effort
  • hard work
  • seek support
  • individual differences
  • abilities
  • capabilities
What to do next:
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