In the modern world¬, it is no longer necessary to use animals as food or other products, such as medicines and clothing. Do you agree or disagree?
In the 21st century, some people argue that we now have various elements and substances which can replace animals to produce meals and
also
supply to
the medical and garment industry. From my viewpoint, I partially agree with Change preposition
apply
this
opinion.
On the one hand, it is true to say that things
made from those living things
can bring some results that others can’t do, especially food. The fact is people need to be provided with enough nutrients to live a fit and healthy life. For example
, protein, which is an important ingredient for the human body, is hardly found in substitute materials for meat such
as green vegetables. The elements which exist in them help us to make more delicious cuisines, more salutary medicines, and also
more durable, better fabrics.
On the other hand
, the abuse of consuming creatures to manufacture things
can put
some threats to their life. Verb problem
pose
For instance
, several endangered species have been killed each year to make high-priced drugs and extravagant interior decorations such
as rhino’s
horn and elephant ivory. With the rapid growth of technology, scientists now can mix different substances to create Change noun form
rhino
things
that have similar tastes and quality of meat which will reduce indiscriminate and illegal hunting.
All things
considered, animals have many features and characteristics that others don’t have to make a plentiful product for serving our demands. Nevertheless
, the utilization of them for creating daily necessities should be limited,
but doesn't stop using them to avoid bad effects and save some species from extinction.Remove the comma
apply
Submitted by Nguyễn Thanh Thảo on
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Task Response
The essay demonstrates a good level of task response, presenting a balanced view on the topic. However, the reasons supporting the partial agreement could be further developed to provide a more comprehensive response.
Coherence and Cohesion
The essay shows a clear logical structure and presents a well-organized introduction and conclusion. However, the supporting main points in the body paragraphs could be further developed and connected to enhance coherence and cohesion.