The number of people who are interested in and wearing fashionable clothes is increasing. Is this a positive or negative development?

Individuals depict interest in following
up to date
Add a hyphen
up-to-date
show examples
trends to keep up with the changes. In my opinion, it is beneficial for people to follow updates because of the work and development of the country. Especially at a job, there is a certain kind of clothing to be followed. One shouldn’t wear old clothes to the workplace because it is unethical to do so and brings down the image of ourselves and the employer.
Also
, in foreign countries, employees should wear only classic office attire,
otherwise
, they won’t be able to keep
the
Change the word
their
show examples
job
Fix the agreement mistake
jobs
show examples
.
For example
,
while
working in Canada, I wore a normal summer dress for my first day of work to keep it simple, but when I entered the office, I saw that every girl wore an office skirt with a blouse, I felt so out of place because of my under-dressing.
Furthermore
, development in the
fashion
industry enhances the growth of the business and the economy as a whole. It provides employment opportunities to
unemployed
Correct article usage
the unemployed
show examples
and helps to follow trends for all age groups.
Moreover
, youth will be ecstatic to know the style of clothing followed by different countries, which in turn develops the market for dresses.
For example
, X
Fashion
Limited launched a series of dresses from different states, which
has
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
led to the profits of the company and eventually followed by all the other factories in the industry, which resulted in the
overall
growth of income.
Thus
, we should stick to the current
fashion
for the development of the state.
To conclude
,
although
there is a negative effect on traditional dresses, I believe that society should adhere to recent changes to maintain self-esteem and
to
Fix the infinitive
apply
show examples
contribute to the economy.
Therefore
, it is of major importance to follow
up to date
Add a hyphen
up-to-date
show examples
trends in the
fashion
industry.
Submitted by Naga Lakshmi karna on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion
Improve the organization of your ideas and ensure that each paragraph relates clearly to the topic. Use topic sentences and transition words to improve coherence.
task achievement
You have addressed the task effectively, but the examples provided could be more relevant and specific. Ensure that your ideas directly relate to the topic and thoroughly develop your points.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Globalization
  • cultural exchange
  • modernity
  • versatility
  • practicality
  • Western media
  • fashion industry
  • widespread adoption
  • professional settings
  • preservation
  • cultural diversity
  • cultural integration
  • cross-cultural understanding
  • unique cultural identities
  • expression of individuality
  • innovative
What to do next:
Look at other essays: