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Writing Samples
Band 5

Some people think that the government should take care of disadvantaged people such as unemployed and homeless people. Do you agree or disagree?

#people #government #care
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Many people believe that the state should render help by providing for the less privileged individuals who have no jobs and those who have no homes to put their heads. In my own opinion,
i
refers to the speaker or writer
I
 agree that
this
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 is important and
this
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 is very key to the society for so many reasons.
To begin
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 with, Thousands of people lost their jobs due to one reason or the other, especially, during the Covid19 pandemic. A lot of individuals have no money to afford suitable accommodation for themselves, while some couldn't even afford to rent at least a single apartment.
This
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 could lead to the high rate of crime, where many of these disadvantaged
people especially
Accept comma addition
people, especially
 the young ones might see as an opportunity to engage in, to survive which may deter the peace of the community as a whole.
Furthermore
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, people who are homeless tend to be exposed to an unhealthy environment.
which
Suggestion
Which
 could lead to
such
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 individuals falling sick, or dead untimely due to the inability to have a home.
Also
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, homeless people can not be expected to have money for their education,
However
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, if the state could look into these situations and render help to
such
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 individuals, by providing job opportunities, giving grants to the young and old, empowering them by arranging some kinds of vocation programs where the youths can find themselves useful and make some money in other to be able to cater for themselves.
Also
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, the government can provide accommodation free of charge for people so they can find life easy.
This
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 while reducing the crime rate in the society. In summary, the state should cater to the needs of the less destitute by providing them job opportunities and building free accommodation, and well as free education in order to relieve their
stresses
Suggestion
stress
.
Submitted by Taiwo Abiola on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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