IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Some people say that tourism has many negative effects on the countries that people travel to. How true is this statement? What can tourists do to reduce the harmful effects of tourism on local cultures and environments?

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Nowadays,
people
Use synonyms
 really like to travel around the world, so tourism
is
Verb problem
has
show examples
 developed rapidly in many countries and plays an important role in the economy of many nations.
Moreover
Linking Words
, tourism
also
Linking Words
provided
Wrong verb form
provides
show examples
 a lot of jobs for many
people
Use synonyms
.
However
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,
this
Linking Words
 can cause many problems in the countries that
people
Use synonyms
 travel to. One of the worst problems of travelling is the environmental issues.
For example
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, many groups of
tourists
Use synonyms
 litter waste in the wrong place, like rivers or streets,
this
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 mainly causes soil pollution and water pollution.
Furthermore
Linking Words
,
this
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 affects
people
Use synonyms
's health badly.
In other words
Linking Words
, it is one of the causes of diseases like cholera,
even
Correct word choice
and even
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 cancer. It not only affects health
,
Remove the comma
apply
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 but
also
Linking Words
 has a bad influence on many productive activities in that place.
In addition
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, the other problem is the presence of many large crowds of
people
Use synonyms
 in streets and areas of beauty. When
this
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 happens, local
people
Use synonyms
 may feel uncomfortable because many groups of
tourists
Use synonyms
 sometimes make noise.
This
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 happens more frequently in many groups of
tourists
Use synonyms
 that have children. To avoid many bad feelings about the
tourists
Use synonyms
 of local
people
Use synonyms
,
firstly
Linking Words
,
tourists
Use synonyms
 should keep the environment clean and even help local
people
Use synonyms
 to clean
streets
Correct article usage
the streets
show examples
.
Secondly
Linking Words
,
tourists
Use synonyms
 must find out
much
Correct quantifier usage
a lot of
show examples
 information about the rules in the country where they will go to before.
This
Linking Words
 can help visitors obey the rules in that place when
Correct pronoun usage
they
show examples
you
Correct pronoun usage
they
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 arrive there.
Thirdly
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, if holidaymakers have children go on holiday together, they must keep them carefully to avoid many troubles.
To sum up
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, in my view, tourism has many bad influences on the countries that
people
Use synonyms
 visit,
this
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 cannot be denied.
However
Linking Words
, there
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
 a lot of methods to reduce these problems.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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