Many people work long hours, leaving very little time for leisure activities. Does this situation have more advantages or more disadvantages?

Nowadays, a majority of people are working overtime without paying attention towards their hobbies. I opine that,
although
working extra hours provides some materialistic benefits, it
possess
Suggestion
possesses
more disadvantages.
To begin
with the bright side, if anyone is spending more time in an office,
then
definitely he can earn more money than other people. Which secures a financial stability in his
life
and he can
also
achieve fame by getting
higher position
Suggestion
a higher position
in a company. On the flip side, doing
same work
Suggestion
the same work
all the time can lead people to be a victim of health related issues.
For instance
, sitting on the chair for
long period
Suggestion
a long period
long periods
and working in front of
computer screen
Suggestion
a computer screen
the computer screen
computer screens
can weaken someone's eyesight. There is
also
a possibility to suffer from a mental illness like stress and anxiety by pondering on
same problems
Suggestion
the same problems
for long hours.
In addition
, as being a human we
also
have a responsibility towards our family members, friends and society and they are always seeking
for
Suggestion
to
our attention. So, by not spending some
cozy
enjoying or affording comforting warmth and shelter especially in a small space
cosy
moments with them your relation can be compromised and you can be a victim of loneliness in the
life
.
Moreover
, as excessive overtime
drain
Suggestion
drains
our energy as well as creativity, it can head to a reduced productivity an result into a job dissatisfaction. By which, one may put a threat in a career.
For example
, I have seen a downfall in a progress of my friends and family members just because of being a workaholic and avoiding to look for a
lesiour
time available for ease and relaxation
leisure
activities
Suggestion
activity
. To conclude, though there are significant benefits of being workaholic, it's downside outweighs the positive impact. So, I opine that people should maintain a balance between personal and professional
life
.
Which
Suggestion
Witch
H can lead them towards healthy, happy and creative
life style
a manner of living that reflects the person's values and attitudes
lifestyle
.
Submitted by shaunak mirani on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • work-life balance
  • mental well-being
  • burnout
  • stress relief
  • productivity
  • economic growth
  • career progression
  • skill enhancement
  • quality time
  • financial security
  • leisure activities
  • physical health
  • personal relationships
  • stress-related illnesses
What to do next:
Look at other essays: