IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Some people think the governments should increase the cost of fuel for cars and others vehicles in order to solve environmental problem. To what extend do you agree or disagree?

#people #governments #cost #fuel #cars #vehicles
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
In past years due to environmental issues that we struggled with some measures were taken
such
 as boosting the oil and
fuel
 price.
This
 was a semi impactful step which is believed by some.
However
, I think that to solve the environmental problem
this
 measure is not enough. Money related things better called the monetary system always had an impact on society and people because these days mankind is so dependent on money, so increasing material cost or putting financial pressure on people in order to reduce environmental damage seems to be an achievable purpose.
moreover
in addition
Moreover
, when
fuel
 cost figures increased not only can we save our world from pollution, but
also
 heavy traffics so it can act as a deterrent to car drivers and force them to use public transportation or clean transportation facilities. Despite all the great fact that
this
 method brought to the table, there are
also
 some downsides which make
this
 scheme not fully acceptable. It was mentioned in the
last
 paragraph that money is an integral part of our life, but how about the
fuel
 itself, we can barely find a factory which starts without fossil
fuel
, so when
fuel
 prices are escalating the inflation rises too and inflation results in market disequilibrium.
Furthermore
, we may witness the disappearance of jobs which associated with
fuel
such
 as
fuel
 production and distribution organizations, taxi drivers.
Consequently
, just by increasing
fuel
 costs, we are not able to tackle ecological damages. In conclusion, increasing the cost of
fuel
 is an effective way to solve the environmental problem, but if we add something complementary like increasing public awareness about
fuel
 consumption the result is going the be superior to before.
Submitted by iliz_sim on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: