IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

As a result of tourism, many historical buildings and sites are being damaged beyond repair. What could be done to prevent it?

International visitors and
tourist
Use synonyms
 have helped the many
Use synonyms
nation
Suggestion
nations
 to uplift their failing economy, Thailand is considered to be one of them.
However
Linking Words
, it brings the deterioration of the heritage of their ancestors as well. To preserve the historical constructions and sites
their
in or at that place
there
 are many measures can be taken which will be detailed in
this
Linking Words
 essay.
To begin
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 with, imposing the special tax to the foreigners to will help the government to rebuild the historical structures or even repairing them. To put it another way, the special
department
Use synonyms
 should be formed which will look after the heritage buildings for repair and re-construct and to run
this
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department
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 the
earning
the excess of revenues over outlays in a given period of time (including depreciation and other non-cash expenses)
earnings
 from taxes will be grateful and welcomed.
For example
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,
Nigeria which
Accept comma addition
Nigeria, which
 is considered to be one of
the poor
Suggestion
the poorest
Use synonyms
nation but
Accept comma addition
nation, but
 is developing through
tourist
Use synonyms
 for their forest. They have a made
Use synonyms
department which
Accept comma addition
department, which
were assigned
Suggestion
was assigned
 to look after the shortfalls and damages to the forest.
Furthermore
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, awakening the
tourist
Use synonyms
 for the importance of these sculptures to their local will help the
nation
Use synonyms
 to protect these buildings and sites. To elaborate in another way, the schooling
department
Use synonyms
 should be formed which will educate the foreigners after the arrival to their country.
For instance
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, in North Korea when any international
tourist
Use synonyms
enter
Suggestion
enters
 their
nation
Use synonyms
, they are allowed to go anywhere before they attend the 3
hours
Suggestion
hour
 session with the
tourist
Use synonyms
 expert which guide them about the laws of their society and the vital importance of their cultural heritages. To conclude, the tourism cannot be banned just to conserve the historical sites and buildings. It
bring
Suggestion
brings
 the innumerable opportunities not only for the nations but for the individual as well. Whereas, schooling them like North Korea and forming the authority to maintain them like Nigeria will help in some extent to save the ancestor pride.

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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