IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Students should not be allowed to use mobile phone at school. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

The mobile
phone
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 has become the most well-known gadget in the modern world.Some people conflict about the
use
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 of mobile
phone
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 at
school
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. I completely agree with the opinion that it should be prohibited for a number of
reason
Suggestion
reasons
. Analysing the impacts of mobile phones on the students
a
expresses position, direction or location, or point in time
at
school
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 will show
this
Linking Words
. One of the most obvious reasons is that students could be distracted by their mobile phones.
For instance
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, the sound of notifications, which come from the messengers,
instagram
Suggestion
,
Accept space
,
or the games you play on your devices, could interrupt the lecture, even to everyone and the quality of the teacher's lecture. If you cannot leave your devices away, put the
phone
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 on the vibration and concentrate fully on your study, it is difficult to believe that you will be
completed
Suggestion
completing
 your tasks successfully at
school
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.
Thus
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,
this
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 makes it clear that these devices might disturb to the learning of students in some cases. Another problem associated with the
use
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 of mobile phones is that they enable students to cheat during tests as many cases have been reported. If cell
phone
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use
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 is allowed during lecture
,
Accept space
,
 it will be advanced for teachers to control and catch students who are texting each other or copying with the answers of others during the tests and final exams through the devices can access to the Internet.
Furthermore
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, cell
phone
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use
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 in class can make students be lazy in brainstorming and making
use
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 of creativity in the case they deal with difficult issues.
As a result
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, using mobile
phone
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 in class should be banned
early
Suggestion
earlier
 and prevented at
school
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 effectively. In conclusion, I believe that a ban on the
use
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 of mobile
phone
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 at
school
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 should be imposed because it is highly likely to pose several debatable problems.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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