obesity is becoming a serious problem in many countries. Explain the main causes and effects of this problem, and suggest some possible solutions.

Nowadays, children of many countries are becoming obese and
this
in turn is becoming a serious worldwide issue. Major reasons, consequences and solutions of childhood obesity are discussed in
this
essay. There are two main factors that
are contributed
Suggestion
have contributed
are contributing
contribute
to
chidren
Suggestion
child
children
obesity. The
first
thing is bad eating habits like fast food or drinking sugary soft drinks. The children, as an example, they are fond of eating
humbergers
a sandwich consisting of a fried cake of minced beef served on a bun, often with other ingredients
hamburgers
, KFC with coca. Another possible reason that children, nowadays, prefer playing computer games, chatting on the Internet to doing sports. They spend much time playing games online so that they cannot join in physical activities. As a consequence of these factors, children, these days are becoming obese. These problems lead to children are overweight, unhealthy or unfit to play physical exercises.
As a result
, children are overweight at
early age
Suggestion
an early age
, and
this
could lead to increase the risk of some serious diseases
such
as
choresterol
of or relating to or inhabiting the land as opposed to the sea or air
terrestrial
, heart attack. There are several solutions that could be taken to solve the problems mentioned above.
Firstly
, it is important for parents to control children’s healthy diet. Parents should educate children about
serious effects
Suggestion
the serious effects
of an imbalanced diet so that they can make healthier food choices.
For example
, the diet that includes more vegetables and less fat contents. Another solution, parents should restrict the time the children spend on
computer
Suggestion
the computer
.
Furthermore
, they always encourage their kids to take regular exercises. In conclusion, it is obvious that there are several factors causing obesity in children and there are possible actions which can make
this
bad
Suggestion
worse
consequence pretty comfort.
Submitted by bebe Huyền on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: