IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 7

Some people think certain prisoners should be made to do unpaid community work instead of being put behind bars. To what extend do you agree?

#people #prisoners #community #work #bars
It is thought by some people that the prisoners should be forced to do volunteer work during imprisonment. While putting people in jail teaches them a valuable lesson, I completely agree that they should get involved in a free service to the community during their prison
time
.
This
 not only helps the
society but
Accept comma addition
society, but
also
 helps prisoners to gain some new skills. It is natural to isolate prisoners from the outside world, so that they don't cause any
further
 trouble to the fellow human beings. Depending on the level of crime they committed, a rehabilitation program can be offered
initially
 and upon successful completion, they should sign up for volunteer work. Currently, there are many organizations who are relying on helping hands, especially old age and orphanages. These non-profit works will bring a different perspective and a new outlook to their life.
Similarly
, there are several information technology (IT) organizations who are constantly looking for volunteers to fill several positions
such
 as customer service and tech support specialist. These roles expect people to have excellent communication and troubleshooting skills, which could be taught to prisoners through a training program. After the prison
time
, most prisoners have a difficult
time
 in finding new employment opportunity. So, if prisoners are involved in any
such
 activities, they may acquire knowledge that can be used to find a job later. In conclusion, prisoners deserve to be kept away from common people because of the crime they committed.
However
,
government
Suggestion
the government
 should impose changes to the system that would make prisoners serve volunteer work during prison
time
. Ultimately,
this
 will benefit the local communities and the prisoners as well.
Submitted by Revanth on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: