A gift (such as a camera, a soccer ball, or an animal) can contribute to a child’s development. What gift would you give to help a child develop? Why?

#gift #camera #soccer #ball #child’s #development #child

There are many

way

Suggestion

ways

to contribute to a child’s development, they go

from

Suggestion

for

the food she eats, the way she is educated to her toys. In

fact they

Accept comma addition

fact, they

learn and develop throughout their entire lives. So, if I had a chance to give

present

Suggestion

presentations

for children, I would choose a

book

. In my opinion, books have an influence on our development, give us more knowledge. In the following paragraphs, I will give

objective form of "I"

reason

Suggestion

a reason

to support my answer.

First

of all,

book

Suggestion

the book

a book

is a huge source of information, it gives children opportunity to acquire new knowledge that helpful for

future

Suggestion

the future

For instance

, scientific books provide knowledge in the field of science, novels have the information

Suggestion

about

cultures and customs in some regions.

Second

, reading

also

improves your memory and concentration. That’s because, we tend to stop and think about the story in the

book

. So children will have

passion

Suggestion

a passion

Suggestion

for

about

books.

In other words

, if parents give them a good

book

, their child will become a good person.

Furthermore

, books make children more successful.

Last

but not least, reading books improves their communication skill. Books have a large number of vocabulary. The results

Suggestion

are

that you have more new words to use when talking, or having a speech or presentation. To sum up, it is true that we have several

choice

Suggestion

choices

in order to give children as a gift, but we should choose a gift which can contribute to a child’s development.

Submitted by Minh Hiền HN on Sat Jul 25 2020

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Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
13Grammar mistakes
 

6 paragraphs

242 words

<40

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

5.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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A gift (such as a camera, a soccer ball, or an animal) can contribute to a child’s development. What gift would you give to help a child develop? Why?

Fully explain your ideas

The world today is a safer place and governments should stop spending large amounts of money on their armed forces. To what extend do you agree or disagree with this statement?

In the past people liked to store knowledge in books. However, in the present, we prefer to store knowledge on the Internet. Do you think the advantages outweight the disadvantages?

The youth crime rate is rising rapidly in many countries. What are the reasons for this trend? What can parents and teachers do to solve it?

Governments should make public transportation free in order to reduce the number of private vehicles on roads, therefore leading to lower carbon emissions. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation, such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Others argue that it is better to try and improve such situations. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. Write at least 250 words.