Some people think that the internet has brought people closer together while others think that people and communities are becoming more isolated. Discuss both sides

#people #internet #communities

With the advent of technologies like

internet

Suggestion

the internet

it has made our life very much easier as compared to the bygone

time

. It is believed that net plays a vital role in

humans

Suggestion

human

human's

life.As few individual suggest that it had brought people closer together

Accept space

but some people opine that it had made communities more isolated.

this

Suggestion

This

essay will discuss both the views in detail.

To begin

with, cyberspace has brought the families together living far away through easier and better communication facilities.

there

Suggestion

There

are many

internet

based applications like

Accept space

facebook

Suggestion

Facebook

Accept space

instagram

Accept space

messenger

etectra

. Whereas in erstwhile

time

communication where made through meetings or by post, but it was a very long process.

However

Accept space

with

time

this

has changed.

For instance

, the families of a person living abroad can commune through facilities like

Nowdays

Suggestion

Now days

it has become a piece of cake.

On the other hand

, there are some individual who

suggest

Suggestion

suggests

that it had made communities more isolated than ever before.

First reason

Suggestion

The first reason

for

that is

the man is not a social animal as it was before the arrival of new technologies

Accept space

now they prefer meetings through video call

instead

of meeting

traditionaly

according to tradition; in a traditional manner

traditionally

traditional

. The

phycial

involving the body as distinguished from the mind or spirit

physical

touch between them is absent,

this

also

sometime

on certain occasions or in certain cases but not always

sometimes

put strain on their mental development.

secondly

Suggestion

Secondly

, the gap between families are

amiliorating

tending to ameliorate

ameliorating

due to excessive use of

internet

Suggestion

the internet

. Now

eveyone

all people

everyone

has their personal online platforms as they are spending

colossal amount

Suggestion

a colossal amount

time

on social media. To conclude, every coin has two sides. No doubt, the

internet

has made the planet earth a global

village but

Accept comma addition

village, but

the negative consequences of net cannot be ignored.

Submitted by kartikay on Tue Jul 28 2020

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10Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
27Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

264 words

6.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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