People, nowadays, are not as fit and active as they were in the past. What are the reasons and what measures can be taken for this?

#people #measures

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It as an inevitable fact that compared to yesteryears, majority of

population

Suggestion

the population

is not healthy and agile in today’s world. Several causes can be examined for

such

Linking Words

a situation;

however

Linking Words

, some remedial steps can be taken to improve the fitness level of public. Both the reasons and the solutions to tackle the above-mentioned issue

are elaborated

Suggestion

is elaborated

ensuing paragraphs

Suggestion

the ensuing paragraphs

. Certainly, individuals have become less physically and emotionally healthy as well as non-energetic.

This

Linking Words

is because, they are working round-a-clock, and are workaholic.

Instead

Linking Words

of playing outdoor sports or jogging, they are choosing

work

Use synonyms

fulfill

put in effect

fulfil

their luxury desires. Eventually, due to increased stress their mental health is

also

Linking Words

affected.

Moreover

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, during holidays,

many

Suggestion

much

like to stay home and watch Netflix and pay video games rather than actual sports.

Furthermore

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, with the advancement of technology,

hard laborious

Accept comma addition

hard, laborious

work

Use synonyms

is replaced by mechanization.

For instance

Linking Words

, in factories which were doing all

work

Use synonyms

by hands,

thesedays

Suggestion

these days

, those tasks are done by robots

such

Linking Words

as lifting and carrying materials.

Hence

Linking Words

, populace turned into ill-being and clumsy. There can be few

strategies

Suggestion

strategy

needs to be put in order to mitigate

this

Linking Words

issue.

However

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, who should be ought to take

actions

Suggestion

action

? It is not only the responsibility of administration but

also

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the civilians.

To begin

Linking Words

with, governments can promote healthy well-being via

campaigns

Suggestion

the campaigns

. They should encourage people for mobility by organizing competitive sports: marathon and

cyclothon

Suggestion

Authorities

Suggestion

The authorities

can make policies regarding working hours and vigilant over rules enforcement.

In addition

Linking Words

, citizens could spend some time doing home exercises if they are not able to go in the gyms.

Also

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, playing some outdoor sports with their families will improve their health condition.

Besides

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this

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this

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will improve their emotional health.

Thus

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, with the combined efforts

this

Linking Words

problem can be overcome. To conclude,

this

Linking Words

essay discussed that continuous running and decreased physical

work

Use synonyms

are the causative factors of not being as healthy as our ancestors and

therefore

Linking Words

, tackling the causes by the suggested solutions at the earliest can save the human race from suffering with diseases.

Submitted by radha on Fri Jul 31 2020

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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14
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
12
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

338 words

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People, nowadays, are not as fit and active as they were in the past. What are the reasons and what measures can be taken for this?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Shopping is the favourite pastime of most of the young people. Why is this the case? Do you think they should be encouraged to do some other useful activities in their free time?

Some people think that success in life coms from hard work and determination, while others think that there are more important factors such as money and appearance. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

In the future all cars, buses and trucks will be driverless. The only people travelling inside these vehicles will be passengers. What are the advantages and disadvantages of driverless vehicles?

Some people prefer to go to health clubs and gyms for health care, some say the walking and climbing stairs are more effective. Discuss both vies and give your opinion.