IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5

Nowadays, many families have both parents working some working parents believe other family members like grandparents can take care of their children, while other think child care center provide the best care. Discuss both view and give your own opinion.?

#families #parents #members #grandparents #care #children #child #center
Most of the parents trust grandparents for providing good
responsibility
,
however some
Accept comma addition
however, some
 depends on child duty centre.
This
 essay will enumerate my positive opinion about the
grandparents
Suggestion
grandparent
 power as compare to
responsibility
 centre which is given below. To embark on, numerous of parents are going offices by leaving their children behind with their grandparents. As they trust that, grandparent will take
responsibility
 for them.
Firstly
, with grandparent offsprings feel safe and secure at home.
Secondly
, grandparents teach valuable things to their grandparents. They teach the sacraments and good habits with love and authority.
Moreover
, the children grown under their grandparents are more attached to family and relatives, and in return kids are loved by every member of the family.
On the other hand
, there are plenty of childcare centres who generally take
responsibility
 of the young lives by taking the money.
Firstly
, they have their own rules and regulations through which they teach children.
Secondly
, they have specific timings under which parents have to take their children from duty centres.
However
, these centres are mostly for those parents who have nuclear family and who do not have anyone for their child cares. They teach children by entertaining them and by doing a number of acts. They are advanced in using technology to build their brains. They help kids in advance and learning acts quickly. To conclude,
responsibility
 taking is most important part of child growth and
this
 can be well supported only by their grandparents.
However both
Accept comma addition
However, both
 are beneficial, but
However
,
bothult
(sports) a division during which one team is on the offensive
bout
 to take care of all the individual children equally.
Submitted by sd.lamba on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: