IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 2

Comparison pie charts children and adults eating place preferences during 2005 in US.

#comparison #children #adults #place #preferences
The two pie charts illustrate the location where adults (20+) and children (2-9 years old) consumed
food
 in the year 2005 in the US. Overall, both adults and children ate
most
Suggestion
the most food
most foods
food
 at
home
. The two
charts
feline mammal usually having thick soft fur and no ability to roar: domestic cats; wildcats
cats
 were split into
home
,
resturant
a building where people go to eat
restaurant
restaurants
, fast
food
 joints, other away from
home
 and school (only for children).
Firstly in
Accept comma addition
Firstly, in
 regards to adults, highest proportion were eating at
home
 followed by fast
food
 joints. While
resturant
a building where people go to eat
restaurant
 eaters and proportion eating at other places had more or less the same percentage.
Secondly in
Accept comma addition
Secondly, in
 terms of children's data, they
has
Suggestion
have
 a similar trend
to
Suggestion
for
 adults as most of them ate
home
 (67%), followed by fast
food
 joints.
However
, the least proportion was divided
in
Suggestion
into
 other away from
home
 and school. The most significant difference was seen between the number of adults and children who ate in
resturants
a building where people go to eat
restaurants
restraints
 as the percentage was two times higher than children.
Submitted by mehulsharma on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: