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Writing Samples
Band 7.5

International travel is becoming cheaper and more countries are opening their doors to increase the number of tourists. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages ?

#travel #countries #doors #tourists
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The emergence of cheaper airlines worldwide enhances the
income
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 from tourists, and access to other regions is frequent. It is well-known that some cheaper airlines have become representative of the airline industries already.
This
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 essay suggests the occurrence is beneficial for countries and the advantages of growing tourists' number outweigh the disadvantages with some reasonable reasons.
Firstly
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, one of the greatest benefits of growing tourism is improving the countries' economy rate because of developing
income
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. Another positive is the improvement of the welfare of local communities. More visitors mean that there will be an increasing demand for employees in the workforce, leading to the employment rate.
For example
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, many authorities for tourists that require human supervision have been built on beaches in Hawai to add more job fields.
In addition
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, it gives people with high
income
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 and extra incentives at peak time on holidays.
Therefore
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, the increase of tourists contributes highly to the increase in people's
income
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, which directly develops the countries' economy and general well-being of society.
Conversely
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, the cost of regular maintenance may be very considering the keeping quality of the travel site steadily in order to attract more visitors, which may be impossible without the help of high
income
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 from these sites.
Furthermore
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, overcrowding may
also
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 be a big issue because people tend to gather around a certain popular place.
However
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, the former can be practically dealt with the money earned, and the latter can resolve by expanding the attraction sites into bigger places. In conclusion,
although
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 the amount of money is high to maintain the sites, but it can be eventually solved by the earning from tourism which it eventually goes back to the community. For these reasons,
this
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 essay suggested that the positives outweigh the possible negatives.
Submitted by 室谷寛樹 on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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