In some countries, the average weight of people is increasing and their level of health and fitness is decreasing. What do you think are the causes of these problems and what measures could be taken to solve them?

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In
this
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day and age, obesity rate in certain countries around the world is alarming.
As a result
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, people’s health and fitness are deteriorating rapidly. In
this
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writing, I will shed some lights on main factors contributed to
this
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alongside with suggested steps to solve
this
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issue. There are numerous reasons which
subsequently
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lead to the aforementioned problem. People,
first
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and foremost, are busy and busier to take good care of their health. In lieu of having home-cooked meals, they would opt for
processed
Suggestion
processing
food or fast foods since it is less time-consuming.
In addition
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to that, people tend to be increasingly sedentary.
In other words
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, hardly would people these days spend time
outdoor
Suggestion
outdoors
for sports and other leisure activities. Inevitably, the average weight of people is rocketing in some areas worldwide. In order to deal with
this
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negative trend, solutions must be taken.
Firstly
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, governments should impose a levy on unhealthy foods
such
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as snacks, sweets so there would an increase in their prices.
Moreover
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, if more money is invested on sport facilities, people would be encouraged to make use of them.
Last
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but not least, each person should bear in mind that being whether physically fit or not does matter their health condition,
thus
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they should care for their weight. In conclusion,
although
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high overweight rate globally is a distressing issue, there are possibly several ways to alleviate
this
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.
Submitted by Andy on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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