Some people think that in the modern world we are more dependent on each other, while others think that people have become more independent. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

It is true that in today’s society, people tend to depend on each other. While some people advocate

this

Linking Words

view, I believe that individuals have become more independent. On the one hand, there are those who believe that people are likely to rely on others nowadays.

Firstly

Linking Words

, young people who have just embarked on their career struggle with many things in life. Because they are novices in their company, they are paid

meager

deficient in amount or quality or extent

meagre

salaries.

As a result

Linking Words

, they do not enough finances to purchase big assets, which are exorbitant,

such

Linking Words

as a house and a car, and they need their parents’ help to solve the problem.

Secondly

Linking Words

, people have a tendency to count on co-workers at work. Today, many jobs

Suggestion

are

highly specialised, so it requires people to attain professional skills and knowledge

Accept space

However

Linking Words

, It is hard for one person to do alone. They need to collaborate with another to come up with a plan.

On the other hand

Linking Words

, I side with those who argue that individuals become increasingly independent. In the modern world, the proliferation of the internet allows people to access information easily, so they could search for any things without help. There

Suggestion

are

a number of online courses in diverse fields,

such

Linking Words

as learning English, cooking, information technology.

Therefore

Linking Words

, students no longer necessary to attend an in-person class. Take my brother as an example. He is inundated with business, so he does not have time participating in an English class without flexible time, but by learning online course he might actively get knowledge whenever and wherever he wants. In conclusion, despite the benefits of people’s dependence on each other, I contend that individuals have become increasingly independent. It is

therefore

Linking Words

important that individuals should more independent in their life.

Andy

Aug 24, 2020

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8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

293 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

interdependence
globalization
technological advancements
collective action
digital evolution
minimal reliance
direct interaction
empowered
access to technology
societal expectations
personal choice
leverage

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