IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Some people think that studying history is a waste of time while others think it is essential to learn. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

#people #history #waste #time
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During our studies, we learn multiple
subjects
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. Each
subject
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 has its own importance.
Although
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 some
people
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 think learning
history
Use synonyms
 has no significance, others assert studying
this
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subject
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 is valuable.
This
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 essay will delve into both vantage points and,
subsequently
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, will explore my own perspective in
turns
Fix the agreement mistake
turn
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. The proponents of
the
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apply
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history
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 as a
subject
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 postulate that, it tells the younger generation about experiences and problems faced by our forefathers, and how they handled those.
Moreover
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, it tells about, how our culture and the country evolved gradually. Sometimes to predict
the
Correct article usage
apply
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future development,
past
Correct article usage
the past
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 helps.
For example
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, for some human deceases, scientists explored the cure from the
history
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 books. On the other side, some
people
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 say,
to memorize
Change preposition
that memorizing
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 some important dates, names, facts and events
do
Correct subject-verb agreement
does
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 not help to get a
job
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,
instead
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 they feel
people
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 should learn other
subjects
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 like maths, physics, and science. Nowadays, if we look at the
job
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 market, the percentage of jobs available related to
the
Correct article usage
apply
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history
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are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
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 substantially less,
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Correct word choice
and thus
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thus
Correct your spelling
the
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 preference of the students is to study
subjects
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 which help them to gain a desired
job
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.
For instance
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, big brands like Google and Amazon prefer candidates with
the
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a
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 scientific background.
In addition
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, some
people
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 think that
the
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apply
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history
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 is a boring
subject
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, all things we need to memorize.
However
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, for other
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subjects
Add a comma
subjects,
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 they don't require memorization. In conclusion, there are benefits of learning
history
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 as a
subject
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 but to grow academically and to obtain a good
job
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, it is required to study other
subjects
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also
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.
Submitted by pjoshi on

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task response
Ensure to address all parts of the essay question and provide a clear opinion on the matter.
coherence and cohesion
Organize your essay in a more structured manner, including a clear introduction and conclusion, and ensure that each paragraph supports your main points effectively.
lexical resource
Expand your range of vocabulary and use more varied and precise language to express your ideas.
grammatical range
Work on your sentence structure, grammar accuracy, and use of different sentence types to enhance the overall quality of your writing.
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