IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3

wealth does not necessarily guaranty happiness. To what extent do you agree with this statement?

#wealth #guaranty #happiness
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Money
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 is really essential in order to satisfy the basic needs
such
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 as food,
s
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helter and cloths.
I
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t is said by some individuals that wealth is not the only way to get contentment.
I
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n my perspective,
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m
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oney can be the source of delights, but we can not buy everything with it because it depends on the right attitude of the people towards life.
To begin
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 with,
i
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f a
person
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 is wealthy,
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t
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hen he can lead a luxurious lifestyle and visit different countries
,
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w
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hen he travels diverse nations,
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t
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hen he gets chance to see beautiful natural creations and man-made creations of the world which is the source of pleasure.
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M
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oreover, a rich
person
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 can get expensive treatment at the
ospital
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hospital
,
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A
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lthough poor people die with disease and misery.
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F
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or instance,
i
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t is generally seen that celebrities have
l
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a
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ot of
money
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and they spend
an
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a
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normous
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enormous
 amount of
money
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 on marriages and celebrations and,
w
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hich gives the impression that they fully enjoy.
On the other hand
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,
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h
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the
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appiness of the
person
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also
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 depends upon them because some people are rich but they are not happy.
T
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o illustrate, one of my relatives had
l
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a
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ot of
money
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,
b
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ut he was lonely and depressed because his children left their house,
s
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o that
person
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 can remain happy by involving himself in his favourite hobbies,
b
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ut he has chosen to live sadly. To recapitulate, I would like to write that every
person
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 can stay happy,
b
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ut it is in his own hands.
Submitted by raman on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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