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Writing Samples
Band 5

Some people say that vertical city is best where people can live, while others say that horizontal cities are better. Discuss both the views and give your opinion.

#people #city #cities
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Population
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The population
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 of people are getting higher every decade. The number of people who migrate from
c
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the
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ountryside to
city
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are
Change the verb form
is
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 developing.
However
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, a
city
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 has its own capacity to bear individuals.
Therefore
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, there are 2 different ideas to build a
city
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 correspond to the developing number of human populations, which are vertical
city
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 and horizontal
city
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. It has been argued that
one
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idea
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are
Change the verb form
is
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 better than
other
Change the wording
another idea
other ideas
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idea
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.
However
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, I think it is depend
of
Verify preposition usage
on
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 their needs.
First
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 of all, I would like to say that
v
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the
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ertical
city
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 is
very
Correct your spelling
every
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temptation
Replace the word
tempting
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 for me.
This
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idea
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 is
such
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 a big innovation for urban
live
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life
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.
Vertical
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The vertical
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city
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 is offered a notion that
b
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a
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unch of people can live together in the same roof.
Also
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, the building repairment or maintenance is
controled
Correct your spelling
controlled
 by the building management.
This
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mean
Change the verb form
means
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 that we can leave that household improvement to the officials. So, we can use our time to do anything else.
This
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 is very beneficial for people who live in a small family and busy with their works.
Therefore
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, they can focus on their businesses rather than take care of building problems. Another creative
idea
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 in
this
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 field is that it uses the land that
are
Change the verb form
is
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 not occupied with buildings to be used as parks, which can be a better place for people to relax. On the other side,
h
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a
the
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orizontal
city
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 is much more traditional rather than
v
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the
a
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ertical
city
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.
Although
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 it is
quite
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quite an
a quite
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 old
idea
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, there are
l
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a
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ot of
peple
Correct your spelling
people
 still agree with
this
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 choice.
This
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 term can be described as
one
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 family in a roof.
This
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 is
neccessary
Correct your spelling
necessary
 for big
familiy
Correct your spelling
family
 that consists of over than 4 people. If
this
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 kind of family
live
Replace the word
life
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 in
v
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a
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ertical
city
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, I am
affraid
Correct your spelling
afraid
 that
the
Change the article
apply
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space
it
Delete the pronoun
apply
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is not enough.
Therefore
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, they need
l
Add an article
a
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arger place to live together in
one
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 roof.
This
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 horizontal
city
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 can be found in the developing countries, which commonly have more than 5 people in a family, and the shortage of equipments
are
Change the verb form
is
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also
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one
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 of
b
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the
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ig problems.
Therefore
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, they can not provide a vertical
city
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 in the near future. In a nutshell, I would like to say that I like the
idea
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 of
v
Add an article
a
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ertical
city
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 rather than
h
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a
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orizontal
city
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. The reasons are because I like the term of saving some spaces
for
Verify preposition usage
to
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 open
one
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, and
also
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, I do not have a plan to live with
b
Add an article
a
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ig family.
Thus
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,
this
Linking Words
idea
Use synonyms
 of
v
Add an article
the
a
show examples
ertical
city
Use synonyms
 is really into me.
Submitted by michellina594 on

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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