We live in a world of technology these days. While internet brings with it clear advantages, the problem in terms of control and security of information outweighs the advantages. To what extent do you agree?

#world #technology #internet #terms #control #security #information

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Nowadays,technology has become the most important aspect of our life.We receive a huge advantage from the

internet

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However

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,there are a lot of disadvantages

such

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as security and control that outweighs the benefit.Personally, I strongly agree with the statement and the reason will provide on the following paragraph. Begin with, the

first

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reason why technology in

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the

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ield of security has the disadvantages more than benefit on the

internet

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is lack of privacy.There are many problems that we face from the

internet

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especially on

the

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social media.Some people do not have their comfort zone for posting code or picture.

This

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is because a stranger can see their post due to the place and time that we go.

Moreover

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,Online society can not control who is the murder , every people can access to find their information very easily.

Then

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it will create many a lot of crime.

For example

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, according to my experience, I used to be a person who is addictive the

internet

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, I always post my location every day.

Then

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it causes the murder to follow every step that went.After that,they came to my home and stole my notebook.

Therefore

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I never post anything on my media because I am very curious and panic.

In addition

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, another reason is people will gain

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misinformation from the

internet

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.There is a lot of fake news on Facebook or

twitter

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Twitter

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.So we can not know what is

the

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real knowledge.

Moreover

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, most of the problem comes from people about sharing their comment that makes people confusing.

For instance

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, my mom usually read a newspaper,

then

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she compared the information with the

internet

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On the other hand

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, the result was completely different.So she seldom read from

the

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social media. In conclusion, there are many advantages and disadvantages of the

internet

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. We should concern in the privacy and misinformation.

Submitted by tweetyjahjahjah on Sat Sep 05 2020

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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

292 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

global connectivity
digital banking
cybersecurity
data protection
security breaches
cyber attacks
online transactions
digital divide
surveillance
freedom of information
responsible usage
ethical considerations
digital footprints
online behavior
information inequality

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We live in a world of technology these days. While internet brings with it clear advantages, the problem in terms of control and security of information outweighs the advantages. To what extent do you agree?

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

Some people think that the increasing use of computers and mobile phones for communication has a negative effect on young people's reading and writing skills. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In the modern world, schools are no longer necessary because there is so much information available through the internet that children can study just as well at home. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

it is important for people to take risks, both in their professional lives and personal lives. do you think advantages of takinng risk outweigh the disadvantages