It is more important to spend public money on promoting a healthy lifestyle in order to prevent illness than to spend it on treatment of people who are already ill. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Governments around the world incur taxes from their citizens to develop the country in several sectors,
such
as infrastructure, transport, education and medical facilities. It has been vastly developed in a couple of decades,
such
as high-speed transport to move goods fast, R&D investment for educational purposes and multi-storey buildings. As in the case of medical facilities, it is hard to predict the future and even a virus spread could cause collateral damage to the country. A proactive nation would get less impact, by guide their citizens to lead a healthy lifestyle. We can have a discussion on how a nation could be impacted by
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
proactive and reactive behaviour.
First
and foremost, public money needs to be spent in a logical way,
such
as promoting a healthy lifestyle by constructing parks and encourage cycling by a separate lane.
For example
, England has a cycle lane on
its
Delete the pronoun
apply
show examples
most of the road to engage the people.
Secondly
, consumption of fast food has to be less promoted,
such
as advertisements and hoardings.
These
Change the determiner
This
show examples
ad attracts the people's interest, rather than the taste. At
last
, encourage proper diet would effectively create a healthy life and it would help governments, not to push the major share of its income to treat the ill people.
Submitted by bjbharathkumar on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: