IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Do you prefer living in an urban or rural area? State your preference and give reasons to why you feel that way?

#area
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We are living in a world
that
Correct word choice
where
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 urban
areas
Use synonyms
 have been expanding day by day
with
Change preposition
for
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 many reasons.
While
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 some
people
Use synonyms
 are complaining about
this
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 situation, in my opinion,
this
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 is not a bad transformation. Because living in urban
areas
Use synonyms
 provides
a
Correct article usage
apply
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different
kind
Fix the agreement mistake
kinds
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 of advantages when compared to a
rura
Correct your spelling
rural
 lifestyle. First of all, living in urban
areas
Use synonyms
 means that
people
Use synonyms
 are able to reach leisure time activities easily.
As there
Correct word choice
There
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 is various type of entertainment centres in urban
places
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such
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 as theatre and cinema.
On the other hand
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,
people
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 who are living in a rural area may feel isolated
due to
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 limited facilities for entertainment.
Moreover
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, big cities are always ahead
from
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of
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 rural
places
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 in terms of health facilities.
For example
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, many rural inhabitants may be forced to urban
places
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 to get the best medical treatments.
Following
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this
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, a variety of jobs are offered by companies in different fields in urban
areas
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while
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 a diversity of jobs are restricted in rural
areas
Use synonyms
.
For
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this
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 reason,
people
Use synonyms
 may encounter
economical
Replace the word
economic
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 setbacks.
For instance
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, if you are educated in technological fields,you should look for
job
Add an article
a job
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 in big cities. Because urban
areas
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 are invested too much
instead
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 of rural
areas
Use synonyms
.
As a result
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, living in urban
places
Use synonyms
 can be
money-wise
Correct article usage
a money-wise
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 decision especially
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people
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for people
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 who are searching for a job. In conclusion,
people
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 may show different inclinations about living
places
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.
However
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, when we think about opportunities which are served
from
Change preposition
in
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 urban
areas
Use synonyms
such
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 as
job
Fix the agreement mistake
jobs
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 and facilities,
urban
Correct article usage
an urban
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 lifestyle is more convenient for me than a rural lifestyle.
Submitted by cerenkurtul93 on

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coherence cohesion
The essay offers a well-structured response to the task, but could benefit from a stronger introduction and conclusion to clearly outline the writer's position.
task achievement
The essay addresses the prompt and provides relevant reasons to support the writer's preference. However, it would be beneficial to provide more specific examples and develop the ideas further.
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